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Newly updated with stories from people who have turned to this life-altering book in their time of need, this motivational teaching about what really matters reminds us how we can honor each relationship every day.
Four simple phrases—“Please forgive me,” “I forgive you,” “Thank you,” and “I love you”—carry enormous power to mend and nurture our relationships and inner lives. These four phrases and the sentiments they convey provide a path to emotional wellbeing, guiding us through interpersonal difficulties to life with integrity and grace.
Dr. Ira Byock, an international leader in palliative care, explains how we can practice these life-affirming words in our day-to-day lives. Too often we assume that the people we love really know that we love them. Dr. Byock demonstrates the value of “stating the obvious” and provides practical insights into the benefits of letting go of old grudges and toxic emotions. His stories help us to forgive, appreciate, love, and celebrate one another and live life more fully.
Using the Four Things in a wide range of life situations, we can experience emotional healing even in the wake of family strife, personal tragedy, divorce, or in the face of death. With practical wisdom and spiritual power, The Four Things That Matter Most gives us the language and guidance to honor and experience what really matters most in our lives every day.
Ira Byock, M.D., is a leading palliative care physician and longtime public advocate for improving care through the end of life. He is past president of the Academy of Hospice and Palliative Medicine and cofounder of Life's End Institute: Missoula Demonstration Project, Inc., a community-based research and quality improvement organization focused on end-of-life experience and care. He heads the national Promoting Excellence in End-of-Life Care program for the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. He is director of palliative medicine at Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center and a faculty member of Dartmouth School of Medicine. More information is available on www.TheFourThings.org.
Table of Contents
<P> <FONT SIZE="+1"><B>Contents</B></FONT> <P><BR> <B>Part One: The Four Things</B> <P> Chapter 1: Saying the Four Things<BR> Chapter 2: The Healing Power of Words<BR> Chapter 3: Completing Relationships<BR> Chapter 4: Transformations <P><BR> <B>Part Two: Forgiveness</B> <P> Chapter 5: Loved Ones Live On Inside Us<BR> Chapter 6: Resolving a Legacy of Pain<BR> Chapter 7: The Emotional Economics of Forgiveness<BR> Chapter 8: Extreme Acts of Forgiveness<BR> Chapter 9: Forgiving Yourself<BR> Chapter 10: Living with Uncertainty and Illness <P><BR> <B>Part Three: Thank You</B> Chapter 11: Practicing Gratitude<BR> Chapter 12: The Unexpected Grace of Reconnection<BR> Chapter 13: The Family Dynamics of Gratitude <P><BR> <B>Part Four: I Love You</B> <P> Chapter 14: Creative Ways of Saying the Four Things<BR> Chapter 15: Loving the Body<BR> Chapter 16: Living Every Day as if It Were Your First -- or Last<BR> Chapter 17: Lives Intertwined with Love <P><BR> <B>Part Five: Good-bye</B> <P> Chapter 18: Nothing Left Unsaid<BR> Chapter 19: The Mysterious Magic of Some Good-byes<BR> Chapter 20: Good-byes That Are Gifts Through Time<BR> Chapter 21: Good-byes That Celebrate Life <P> Afterword: Reflections Before Good-bye<BR> Acknowledgments<BR> Index