I Am America (And So Can You!)

by Colbert, Stephen

• ISBN13: 9780446580502
• ISBN10: 0446580503
• Edition: 1st
• Format: Hardcover
• Copyright: 2007-10-09
• Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

Summary

Congratulations--just by looking at this webpage, you became 25% more patriotic.From Stephen Colbert, the host of television's highest-rated punditry show The Colbert Report, comes the book to fill the other 23-+ hours of your day. I Am America (And So Can You!) contains all of the opinions that Stephen doesn't have time to shoehorn into his nightly broadcast.Dictated directly into a microcassette recorder over a three-day weekend, this book contains Stephen's most deeply held knee-jerk beliefs on The American Family, Race, Religion, Sex, Sports, and many more topics, conveniently arranged in chapter form.Always controversial and outspoken, Stephen addresses why Hollywood is destroying America by inches, why evolution is a fraud, and why the elderly should be harnessed to millstones. You may not agree with everything Stephen says, but at the very least, you'll understand that your differing opinion is wrong.I Am America (And So Can You!) showcases Stephen Colbert at his most eloquent and impassioned. He is an unrelenting fighter for the soul of America, and in this book he fights the good fight for the traditional values that have served this country so well for so long.Please buy this book before you leave the store

Author Biography

Stephen Colbert was The Daily Show's longest-running and most diverse correspondent. In addition to his role as Senior Political Correspondent he was one of the hosts of "Even Stephven," a point-counterpoint assault featuring co-correspondent Steve Carell, and the host of "This Week in God," in which he reported on all things theological with the assistance of the "God Machine."

His personality, insight and overall rightness could only lead to The Colbert Report, a half-hour nightly platform for him to give his take on the issues of the day, and, more importantly, to tell you why everyone else's take is just plain wrong. The show has been hugely successful.

Table of Contents

Introduction: Featuring Hello and Other Thoughts
My American Childhood	p. 2
The Family: So Help Me God, I Will Turn This Book Around Right Here	p. 4
Old People: Your Glasses Are on Top of Your Head	p. 20
Animals: Marking My Territory	p. 30
Religion: Accepting Jesus As My Personal Editor	p. 44
My American Adolescence	p. 68
Sports: When It's Okay to Shower With Men	p. 70
Sex & Dating: 1001 Abstinence Positions	p. 86
Homosexuals: Do Not Read By Glowstick Light	p. 106
Higher Education: Smarties Pantsed	p. 118
Hollywood: Lights! Camera! Treason!	p. 130
My American Maturity	p. 148
The Media: Stop the Presses! Forever!	p. 150
Class War: Let Them Buy Cake for a Change	p. 160
Race: Fact or Fiction?	p. 170
Immigrants: No Way, Jose	p. 180
Science: Thanks for the Nukes, Now Go Away	p. 190
A Note to the Future: Instructions on How to Defrost My Head	p. 208
What Have We Learned?	p. 212
How to Retire This Book	p. 216
The White House Correspondents' Dinner	p. 218
Table of Contents provided by Blackwell. All Rights Reserved.