Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love

by Cole; Ellen

• ISBN13: 9780789004369
• ISBN10: 0789004364
• Edition: 1st
• Format: Hardcover
• Copyright: 1998-09-14
• Publisher: Routledge

Summary

Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love explores five lesbian step families'definitions of the step parent role and how they accomplish parenting tasks, cope with homophobia, and define and interpret their experiences. An intensive feminist qualitative study, the book offers guidelines for counselors and lesbian step families for creating healthy, functioning family structures and environments. It is the first book to concentrate exclusively on lesbian step families rather than on lesbian mothering in general. In Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love, you'¬"ll explore in detail the different kinds of step relationships that are developed and what factors may lead to the different types of step mothering in lesbian step families. The book helps you understand these relationships and parent roles through in-depth discussions of: how a step mother and legal mother who live together negotiate and organize parenting and homemaking tasks how members of lesbian step families define and create the step mother role strategies family members use to define and cope with oppression how sexism is transmitted within the family and how mothering may limit and/or contribute to female liberation the opinions and viewpoints of the children of these familiesThe findings in Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love challenge traditional views of mothering and fathering as gender and biologically based activities; they indicate that lesbian step families model gender flexibility and that the mothers and step mothers share parenting--both traditional mothering and fathering--tasks. This allows the biological mother some freedom from motherhood as well as support in it. With insight such as this, you will be prepared to help a client, a loved one, or yourself develop and maintain healthy family relationships.

Author Biography

Janet M. Wright, PhD, is Assistant Professor and Chair of the Department of Social Work at the University of Wisconsin--Whitewater.

Table of Contents

Foreword	xi	(2)
Linda Thompson
Acknowledgments	xiii
Chapter 1. Complexity and Opportunity	1	(36)
Beginning	1	(3)
Theoretical Perspectives	4	(12)
Method: The Complex Relationship of Researcher to Researched	16	(2)
Study Design	18	(3)
The Participant Families	21	(2)
Data Analysis	23	(1)
Validity	24	(4)
Ethical Considerations	28	(6)
Back to the Beginning	34	(3)
Chapter 2. The Family Gestalt	37	(32)
Description of the Participant Families	37	(1)
Introduction	38	(1)
The Norden/Westby/Engleking Family	38	(5)
The Iliff/Dubrovsky/Iliff-Hernandez Family	43	(6)
The Uphoff/Dillard Family	49	(5)
The Peterson/Timms/Taylor Family	54	(6)
The Stark Family	60	(9)
Chapter 3. We are (Normal) Family	69	(28)
Introduction	69	(1)
Discipline Disagreements	70	(6)
The Other Parent	76	(5)
The Children as Active Agents in Family Creation	81	(8)
The Impact of Herstory-Families of Origin	89	(3)
Job Stress	92	(3)
Conclusion	95	(2)
Chapter 4. The Lesbian Couple as Heads of Household: Attempting Matriarchy in the Shadow of Patriarchy	97	(16)
Introduction	97	(1)
Female Coupling	97	(3)
Household Tasks Degendered	100	(5)
Mothering and Fathering Degendered	105	(3)
We Can Father but We Can Never Be Male	108	(3)
Conclusion	111	(2)
Chapter 5. Outside/Insight: Creating the Step Mother Role and Redefining the Mother Role	113	(32)
Introduction	113	(4)
Commitment of Step Mother to Child	117	(2)
The Nature versus Nurture Debate	119	(3)
Step Parents Develop Unique Relationships with the Children	122	(5)
Defining the Step Parent Role: Three Stances	127	(14)
Conclusion	141	(4)
Chapter 6. Forging Families in a Heterosexual Supremacist Environment	145	(50)
Introduction	145	(1)
Children	146	(17)
Parenting in the Mouth of a Dragon	163	(22)
It Takes a Whole Village	185	(7)
Conclusion	192	(3)
Chapter 7. Free to Be You and Me	195	(18)
Introduction	195	(1)
Modeling Gender Flexibility	196	(2)
Shared Parenting	198	(3)
The Impact of Heterosexual Supremacy	201	(2)
Theoretical Implications	203	(2)
Implications for Research and Policy	205	(6)
Conclusion	211	(2)
References	213	(6)
Appendix A. Informed Consent Forms	219	(4)
Appendix B. Structured Interview Questions	223	(6)
First Interview-Couple	223	(2)
Second Interview-Couple	225	(1)
Mom Interview	225	(1)
Step Mom Interview	226	(1)
Child Interview	227	(2)
Appendix C. Journal Instructions	229	(2)
Adults' Journal	229	(1)
Children's Journal	229	(2)
Appendix D. Letters to Participants	231	(6)
Index	237