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People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be compassionate, caring, smart, and funny, but they are also prone to explosive emotional outbursts and highly self-destructive acts. BPD expert Dr. Shari Manning helps overwhelmed loved ones understand whytheir spouse, adult child, or other family member acts so "impossible" -and learn to respond differently. She presents simple yet powerful strategies that can radically transform a troubled relationship. Loads of true stories demonstrate ways to defuse crises, set limits, and help the person with BPD build crucial problem-solving and emotion-management skills. Empathic, hopeful, and science based, this is the first book for significant others grounded in dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), the most effective treatment for BPD. Dr. Manning is a longtime associate of DBT originator Marsha M. Linehan.
Shari Y. Manning, PhD, is a clinician in private practice and the former President/CEO of Behavioral Tech and Behavioral Tech Research, the organizations founded by Marsha M. Linehan to provide training in DBT. Dr. Manning has focused on the treatment of people with BPD since 1993. She lives in Columbia, South Carolina.
Table of Contents
Foreword, Marsha M. Linehan
I. Understanding Your Loved One and Your Relationship
1. \u201cWhy Do I Feel So Lost in This Relationship?\u201d
2. What Makes Someone So Emotional?
3. The Hidden Power of Validation
4. Five Steps to Balanced Responses and Better Outcomes
II. The Many Faces of Borderline Personality Disorder
5. \u0022I Can't Stand Feeling Like This!\u0022
6. \u0022It Was All My Fault\u0022
7. \u0022You Have to Fix This for Me!\u0022
8. \u0022Things Are Awful . . . but Don't Worry; I'm Handling It\u0022
9. \u0022Why Do Terrible Things Keep Happening to Me?\u0022
10. \u0022Nothing's Wrong—I'm Fine\u0022
III. Dealing with Crisis and Getting Help
11. Handling Your Own Difficult Emotions
12. Understanding Self-Harm/Suicide and Making Decisions about Hospitalization
13. Getting Treatment and Support