It Sucked and Then I Cried How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita

by Armstrong, Heather B.

• ISBN13: 9781439171509
• ISBN10: 1439171505
• Edition: Reprint
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2010-03-23
• Publisher: Gallery Books

Summary

Heather B. Armstrongis an American blogger who resides in Salt Lake City , Utah . She and husband Jon Armstrong have a daughter and two dogs: Former Congressman Henry "Buck" Chucklesworth, called Chuck, and Dame Eleanor Ritzford-Fitzsimons Puffs, a.k.a Coco .

Author Biography

heather b. armstrong is the creator of the award-winning dooce.com, the most popular personal blog on the internet She lives in Salt Lake City, Utah, with her family.

Table of Contents

Prologue	p. vii
Let the Anxiety Commence	p. 1
How to Exploit an Unborn Baby	p. 22
A Twenty-pound Basketball With Legs and Arms	p. 33
Dressing Like a Concubine in Humpty Dumpty's Harem	p. 46
Labor to the Tune of Janet Jackson's Nipple	p. 63
You Have to Peed the Baby ... Through Your Boobs	p. 81
Sympathy for the World	p. 95
It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Pokes Their Eye Out With a Baby	p. 101
The Dive That Turned Into a Belly Flop	p. 122
Your Biological Clock Is a Dumbass	p. 135
Other Mothers: Your Harshest Critics	p. 153
Trusting the Wisdom of a Dog	p. 165
Finally, Proof That I Was in the Room When She Was Conceived	p. 180
Heather, Interrupted	p. 190
Her Screamness Who Screams a Lot Every Day With the Screaming	p. 201
If Your Wife Is Pregnant, You Might Want to Skip This One	p. 210
My Arms Spread Completely Wide	p. 223
I Never Thought I Would Become This Woman	p. 243
Afterword	p. 255
Acknowledgments	p. 261
Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved.