Active Parenting First Five Years Parent's Guide

by Popkin, Michael H.; Morris, Amanda Sheffield; Slocum, Ruth; Hubbs-Tait, Laura

• ISBN13: 9781597233439
• ISBN10: 1597233439
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2017-01-07
• Publisher: Active Parenting

Summary

This guide teaches practical parenting skills that really work to help you make the most of your child's first five years. Written by one of the nation's foremost parenting experts, Dr. Michael H Popkin, in collaboration with university child development specialists, Active Parenting: First Five Years will help you nurture your child with a "just right" combination of freedom and nonviolent discipline.

You'll learn about:
- what a baby's cry means
- your child's growing brain
- preventing tantrums and other problems
- building a loving bond
- caring for your child at different ages and stages
- using mindfulness to keep your cool
- 6 ways to prepare your child for school success

...and so much more! Since 1983, Active Parenting has helped over four million parents raise responsible, courageous children who thrive.

Author Biography

Dr. Popkin earned a Doctorate in Counseling Psychology from Georgia State University and served as Director of Child and Family Services at an Atlanta hospital before entering private practice. He and his wife, Melody, live and work together in Atlanta and are the parents of two young adult children.

Dr. Amanda Sheffield Morris is the Bryan Close Professor of Child Development at Oklahoma State University. She is a developmental scientist with research interests in parenting, socioemotional development, and infant and early childhood mental health. Her research focuses on the role of emotion regulation in children and adolescents' adjustment and the ways in which children learn successful regulation skills. Another focus of her work is child and family resilience, and she is particularly interested in how early experiences shape later development with an emphasis on the parent-child relationship.

Ruth Slocum is a family therapist in Tulsa, Oklahoma, specializing in infant and early childhood mental health. She works for Oklahoma State University where she serves as the Mental Health Manager for the Tulsa Children’s Project, a program dedicated to developing interventions to disrupt the intergenerational cycle of poverty. She also oversees the Mental Health Consultation for Tulsa Educare, a high quality early childhood program. Ruth earned her Master of Social Service from the Bryn Mawr School of Social Work and Social Research in Bryn Mawr, Pennsylvania. She lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma and serves on the Board of Directors of the Oklahoma Association for Infant Mental Health.

Table of Contents

CHAPTER 1: You and Your Child
Parents have a special job. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7
Children are special people! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .8
Activity: One Strength . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .11
Ages and Stages Chart . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .21
Your Child’s Nature (Temperament) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .23
Parenting Styles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .24
The Power of Choice . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .27
Choices Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .29
Building a Bond with Your Child . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .30
Paying Attention to Feelings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .32
Every Day, a Little Play . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33
Brain-Building Activity: Follow the Lead . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .35
Playing to Learn Chart . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .36
Taking Care of Yourself . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .38
Self-Care Chart . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .39
Mindfulness: An Introduction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .40
Mindful Moment: The Mind Jar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .41
Home Activities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .43
CHAPTER 2: Preventing Problems
Problems are a part of life . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .45
Your Child’s Beautiful Brain . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .45
Brain-Building Activity: Freeze Dance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .48
Mindful Moment: Many Ways to Breathe . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .49
Keeping Your Child Safe and Sound . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .51
Safe Home Checklist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .54
Playing Safe Checklist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .57
Finding Good Childcare . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .58
Teaching your child is important . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .60
Getting Discipline “Just Right” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .61
Listening to What Your Child Needs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .62
Getting Your Child to Come When You Call . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .62
The Beauty of a Good Rule . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .65
Making Rules Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .68
Discipline Skill: The When-Then Rule . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .69
When-Then Rule Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .70
Discipline Skills: The ACT Method . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .71
5
ACT Method Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 75
Building the Bond: Routines . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .76
Routines Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .77
The Importance of Sleep . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .80
Building the Bond: Hugs, Kisses, and 3 Little Words . . . . . . . . . . . . . .80
“I Love You” Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .81
Taking Care of Yourself Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .82
Home Activities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .83
CHAPTER 3: Encouraging Positive Behavior
Temperament and Discipline . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .85
Temperament Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89
Discipline Skill: Choices and Consequences . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .90
Choices and Consequences Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .95
Brain-Building Activity: Panda and Frog . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .96
Tantrums . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .100
Tantrums Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .105
Mindful Moment: Loving Kindness . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .106
Encouraging Your Child . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .107
Encouragement Worksheet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .111
You need encouragement, too! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .112
Where You Can Go for Help . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .113
Home Activities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .115
CHAPTER 4: Preparing for School Success
Watering Your Child’s Beautiful Brain . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .117
Six Smart Things Parents Can Do to
Help Their Child Get Ready for School . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .118
Smart Thing #1: Encourage play. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .118
Brain-Building Activity: Working Memory . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .121
Smart Thing #2: Encourage learning. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .123
Smart Thing #3: Read and talk with your child. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .126
Smart Thing #4: Limit screen time. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .130
Smart Thing #5: Teach social skills. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .132
Emotional Intelligence . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .133
Video Practice: Identifying and Responding to Feelings . . . . . . . . . .135
Smart Thing #6: Stimulate independence. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .138
The B.E.S.T. Way to Teach Skills . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .140
Mindful Moment: Mindful Parenting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .142
Your child needs you. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .143
Final Thoughts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .143