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9780814417119

Conflict 101 : A Manager's Guide to Resolving Problems So Everyone Can Get Back to Work

by
  • ISBN13:

    9780814417119

  • ISBN10:

    0814417116

  • Format: Paperback
  • Copyright: 2011-05-11
  • Publisher: INGRAM

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Summary

We all know conflict is unavoidable, especially in the workplace. Whether it's a fight over resources, a disagreement about how to get things done, or an argument stemming from perceived differences in identities or values, it's a manager's role to navigate relationships, and build compromises and collaborations. Conflict 101 gives readers the tools they need to ensure not only that employees get back on track, but that disagreements breed positive results. Readers will learn how to:* Build trust* Harness negative emotions* Encourage apologies and forgiveness* Use a solution-seeking approach* Say what needs to be saidIncorporating anecdotes taken from the author's twenty years of experience as a conflict resolution professional, the book helps readers more deeply understand how conflict is created, how to respond to it, and how to manage it more effectively.

Author Biography

Susan H. Shearouse has a Masters Degree in Conflict Resolution and served as Executive Director of the National Conference on Peacemaking and Conflict Resolution. Her clients have included Lockheed Martin, Philip Morris, the IRS, the US Environmental Protection Agency, the US Army Corps of Engineers, and many others. She lives in Vienna, Virginia.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgmentsp. vii
Introductionp. 1
The Joy of Conflictp. 3
Conflict Definedp. 4
Conflict in the Workplacep. 6
Drawing from My Own Experiencep. 9
How We Think About Conflictp. 10
Overview of the Bookp. 17
What Gets in Our Way?p. 20
Fear as a Stumbling Blockp. 21
Blame as a Stumbling Blockp. 24
Assumptions as Stumbling Blocksp. 27
Habits as Stumbling Blocksp. 34
Understanding the Dynamics of Conflictp. 37
What We Need: The Satisfaction Trianglep. 39
Substance Satisfactionp. 41
Process Satisfactionp. 42
Emotional Satisfactionp. 46
Where We are: Levels of Conflictp. 48
The Five Levels of Conflictp. 49
Strategies for Each Conflict Levelp. 55
How We Respond: Approaches to Conflictp. 59
Avoidingp. 62
Accommodatingp. 65
Directingp. 71
Compromisingp. 74
Collaboratingp. 76
Who We Are: Cultural Considerationsp. 81
Culture Definedp. 83
Five Dimensions of Cultural Differencep. 87
Power and Culturep. 97
What We Are Arguing about Matters: Sources of Conflictp. 99
Informationp. 100
Interestsp. 101
Structural Conflictsp. 103
Valuesp. 106
Relationshipsp. 110
Keys to Resolving Conflictp. 121
Building Trustp. 123
Components of Trustp. 124
How to Wreck Trustp. 127
How to Build Trustp. 128
How to Rebuild Trustp. 134
Apology and Forgivenessp. 137
Apology Offeredp. 138
Forgiveness Grantedp. 143
Rethinking Angerp. 151
The Physiology of Emotionsp. 153
How to Manage Your Own Angerp. 162
How to Respond to Someone Else's Angerp. 166
Anger and Violence in the Workplacep. 169
A Sense of Humorp. 172
Keeping Things in Perspectivep. 172
As Simple as a Smilep. 176
Cautions on the Use of Humorp. 179
Timep. 181
Patience Is a Virtuep. 181
Time to Process Feedbackp. 186
Time as a Face-Saving Toolp. 188
Time to Check It Outp. 189
The Right Timep. 190
Putting It All Togetherp. 193
Reaching Agreement: A Solution-Seeking Modelp. 195
A Four-Step Processp. 196
Preparep. 198
Discoverp. 207
Considerp. 210
Commitp. 213
Listening is the Place to Startp. 215
What Keeps Us from Listening?p. 216
The Three C's: Calm. Courage. Curiosity.p. 218
What Are You Listening For?p. 221
The Listener's Toolsp. 222
Saying What Needs to be Saidp. 234
Know Yourself Firstp. 234
Frame the Situation Accuratelyp. 236
Speak to Be Heardp. 239
More Powerful Persuasionp. 243
What to Avoid When You Are Talkingp. 245
The Challenge of Electronic Text Communicationp. 249
The Good, the Bad, and the Uglyp. 250
When Not to Use Electronic Communicationp. 254
How to Write an E-Mailp. 255
A Word About Social Networking (Facebook and Twitter)p. 256
Bibliographyp. 257
Indexp. 261
Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved.

Excerpts

<html><head></head><body><p style="margin-top: 0">Overview of the Book </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Part I sets the stage for understanding conflict, beginning with this chapter. </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Chapter 2, &#8220;What Gets in Our Way?&#8221; explores what happens when </p><p style="margin-top: 0">a working relationship has gotten off track&#8212;how fear, assumptions, </p><p style="margin-top: 0">blame, and habits get in the way of resolving conflicts. </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Part II, &#8220;Understanding the Dynamics of Conflict,&#8221; provides an </p><p style="margin-top: 0">analysis of the dimensions of conflict, which points to the tools to understand </p><p style="margin-top: 0">differences and avoid needless contention. Chapter 3, &#8220;What We </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Need: The Satisfaction Triangle,&#8221; describes three necessary components </p><p style="margin-top: 0">of satisfactory solutions. In Chapter 4, &#8220;Where We Are: Levels of </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Conflict,&#8221; you will see how resolving conflict at the earliest opportunity </p><p style="margin-top: 0">is easiest&#8212;and strategies for dealing with conflicts that have escalated. </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Chapter 5, &#8220;How We Respond: Approaches to Conflict,&#8221; enables you to </p><p style="margin-top: 0">gain a clearer understanding of your own approaches to conflict, and the </p><p style="margin-top: 0">approaches others around you use. From there, you learn strategies for </p><p style="margin-top: 0">beginning to change those approaches when they are not useful and to </p><p style="margin-top: 0">deal more effectively with other approaches you encounter at work. </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Chapter 6, &#8220;Who We Are: Cultural Considerations,&#8221; explores cultural </p><p style="margin-top: 0">differences and the role these differences play in creating and </p><p style="margin-top: 0">resolving conflict. Chapter 7, &#8220;What We Are Arguing About Matters: </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Sources of Conflict,&#8221; analyzes five sources of conflict in the workplace: </p><p style="margin-top: 0">information, interests, structural conflicts, values, and relationships&#8212; </p><p style="margin-top: 0">with a guide to using that understanding to resolve conflict more effectively. </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Part III, &#8220;Keys to Resolving Conflict,&#8221; introduces five concepts managers </p><p style="margin-top: 0">can use to create a more positive climate for workplace relationships. </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Chapter 8, &#8220;Building Trust,&#8221; considers behaviors that build or </p><p style="margin-top: 0">wreck trust and how to rebuild trust that has been broken. Chapter 9, </p><p style="margin-top: 0">&#8220;Apology and Forgiveness,&#8221; addresses the role that apologies and forgiveness </p><p style="margin-top: 0">play, and provides steps to take to apologize effectively and to </p><p style="margin-top: 0">move toward forgiveness. Chapter 10, &#8220;Rethinking Anger,&#8221; explores the </p><p style="margin-top: 0">physiology of anger, as well as ways to manage your own anger or respond </p><p style="margin-top: 0">to others&#8217; anger. Chapter 11, &#8220;A Sense of Humor,&#8221; focuses on the importance </p><p style="margin-top: 0">of keeping the ups and downs of working relationships in perspective; </p><p style="margin-top: 0">and Chapter 12, &#8220;Time,&#8221; reflects on the importance of time in </p><p style="margin-top: 0">decision making and the resolution of conflict. </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Part IV, &#8220;Putting It All Together,&#8221; brings together concepts explored </p><p style="margin-top: 0">in earlier chapters, providing specific conflict-resolution tools and communication </p><p style="margin-top: 0">skills. Chapter 13, &#8220;Reaching Agreement: A Solution- </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Seeking Model,&#8221; delineates a process for addressing differences, presents </p><p style="margin-top: 0">a solution-seeking model, and shows how to use it. Chapter 14, </p><p style="margin-top: 0">&#8220;Listening Is the Place to Start,&#8221; focuses on listening skills and explores </p><p style="margin-top: 0">how managers can listen more effectively. Chapter 15, &#8220;Saying What </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Needs to Be Said,&#8221; gives a guide and some tips for raising concerns and </p><p style="margin-top: 0">addressing issues so that others are more likely to hear your message. </p><p style="margin-top: 0">Chapter 16, &#8220;The Challenge of Electronic Communication,&#8221; explores </p><p style="margin-top: 0">how to use electronic communication effectively in addressing workplace </p><p style="margin-top: 0">conflicts. </p><p style="margin-top: 0"></p><p style="margin-top: 0">Each of the concepts and skills presented here will enable you </p><p style="margin-top: 0">to resolve conflicts more quickly and effectively, which will have an </p><p style="margin-top: 0">immediate impact on morale, productivity, and ultimately the bottom </p><p style="margin-top: 0">line. </p></body></html>

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