Conflict: From Theory to Action

by Lulofs, Roxane S.; Cahn, Dudley D.

• ISBN13: 9780205290307
• ISBN10: 0205290302
• Edition: 2nd
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2000-01-01
• Publisher: Allyn & Bacon

Summary

Providing the most complete coverage of conflict available, this book represents a total approach to the study of conflict. Solid research and theory help readers better understand the nature of conflict, while practical material helps them make better communication choices. In addition to considering what people bring into a conflict in terms of their attitudes, beliefs, values, and personal characteristics, the book offers new ideas and attitudes to help readers approach conflict more effectively. The extensive use of suggestions, applications, narratives and case studies makes this volume an accessible and useful resource. The book deals with conflict from beginning to end -- from perception of the problem to agreement that it has been resolved or managed. It introduces the idea that conflict is inevitable, explores its consequences, then looks at conflict in the context of values, attitudes, and beliefs, followed by gender and culture. Next the book describes types of conflict; its phases and cycles; and conflict styles, strategies, and tactics, with special attention to collaboration as the preferred strategy. The last half of the book covers social psychological and communication perspectives, research on conflict and intimacy, choosing among the communication options available, effectively confronting others, cooperative negotiation in win-lose situations, the escalation of conflict into anger and stress, and impression management. The book ends with a discussion of conflict, forgiveness, and reconciliation. For anyone interested in understanding and dealing with conflict more effectively.

Table of Contents

Preface	xi
PART I Understanding the Nature of Conflict	1	(54)
1 Introduction to the Study of Conflict	2	(19)
Objectives	2	(1)
Key Terms	2	(1)
A Perspective on Conflict	3	(6)
Defining Conflict	3	(3)
Conflict Is Generally Viewed Negatively	6	(3)
The Inevitability of Conflict	9	(3)
Conflict Is a Fact of Life	9	(2)
Interpersonal Violence Is Not a Fact of Life	11	(1)
The Consequences of Conflict	12	(5)
Functions of Conflict	12	(1)
Conflict Communication as Productive or Destructive	13	(4)
From Theory to Action	17	(4)
2 People in Conflict: Values, Attitudes, and Beliefs	21	(18)
Objectives	21	(1)
Key Terms	21	(1)
Socialization and Conflict	22	(1)
Attitudes toward Communication and Conflict	23	(5)
Rhetorical Sensitivity and Communicator Style	23	(1)
Influences on Interpersonal Perception	24	(4)
Functional Beliefs for Managing and Resolving Conflict	28	(7)
Functional Belief One	28	(1)
Functional Belief Two	29	(1)
Functional Belief Three	30	(1)
Functional Belief Four	31	(1)
Functional Belief Five	32	(1)
Functional Belief Six	32	(1)
Functional Belief Seven	33	(1)
Functional Belief Eight	34	(1)
Functional Belief Nine	34	(1)
Attitudes Fostering Conflict Resolution	35	(2)
From Theory to Action	37	(2)
3 Culture and Gender in Conflict	39	(16)
Objectives	39	(1)
Key Terms	39	(3)
A Hierarchical Model of Cultural Understanding	42	(2)
The Hierarchical Model and Cultural Variability	44	(3)
The Challenge of Diversity	47	(1)
Sex, Gender, and Conflict	48	(4)
From Theory to Action	52	(3)
PART II Understanding How Conflict Works	55	(66)
4 Types of Conflict	56	(18)
Objectives	56	(1)
Key Terms	56	(1)
Types of Conflict	57	(9)
Real versus Unreal Conflicts	58	(4)
Substantive versus Nonsubstantive Conflicts	62	(2)
Real and Substantive Conflicts	64	(1)
Mere Disagreements versus Interpersonal Conflicts	65	(1)
Issues as Indicators of Real and Substantive Conflicts	66	(3)
Behavioral Conflicts	66	(1)
Normative Conflicts--Issues of Relationships	67	(1)
Personality Conflicts--Dispositions and Values	68	(1)
Moral Conflict	69	(4)
From Theory to Action	73	(1)
5 The Process of Conflict: Phases and Cycles	74	(25)
Objectives	74	(1)
Key Terms	74	(1)
Phase Theories of Conflict	75	(1)
Patterns and Cycles in Conflict	76	(11)
The Conflict Avoidance Cycle	77	(2)
The Chilling Effect: A Diminished Communication Cycle	79	(2)
The Competitive Conflict Escalation Cycle	81	(6)
Conflict as a Process	87	(10)
The Prelude to Conflict	88	(3)
The Triggering Event	91	(1)
The Initiation of Conflict	92	(1)
The Differentiation of Conflict	93	(3)
The Resolution of Conflict	96	(1)
From Theory to Action	97	(2)
6 Conflict Styles, Strategies, and Tactics	99	(22)
Objectives	99	(1)
Key Terms	99	(1)
Conflict Styles, Strategies, and Tactics	100	(4)
Conflict Strategies and Tactics	104	(5)
Collaboration, Competition, and Avoidance	104	(3)
Other Strategies and Tactics	107	(2)
Collaboration: The Preferred Style	109	(5)
Low Personal and Relationship Stress	109	(1)
High Personal and Relationship Growth and Satisfaction	110	(2)
Phases of Collaboration	112	(2)
Case Studies of Cultural Differences in Conflict Resolution Styles	114	(4)
Criticisms of the Japanese, American, and Yugoslav Approaches to Conflict Resolution	118	(1)
From Theory to Action	118	(3)
PART III Analyzing Conflict: Theory and Reseach in Interpersonal Conflict	121	(66)
7 Social-Psychological Perspectives of Conflict	123	(25)
Objectives	123	(1)
Key Terms	123	(1)
Psychodynamic and Attribution Theories	124	(5)
Psychodynamic Theory	124	(2)
Attribution Theory	126	(3)
Relationship Theories	129	(7)
Social Exchange Theory	129	(3)
Game Theory	132	(1)
Systems Theory	133	(3)
Structural Theory	136	(8)
Trust	137	(2)
Uncertainty	139	(1)
Power	140	(4)
From Theory to Action	144	(4)
8 A Communication Perspective on Conflict Behavior	148	(20)
Objectives	148	(1)
Key Terms	148	(1)
Linear versus Transactional Views of Communication and Conflict	149	(2)
The Linear Model: Message Senders and Receivers	149	(1)
The Transactional Model: People Communicating Together	150	(1)
Rules and Conflict Communication	151	(2)
Communication Competence and Conflict Behavior	153	(4)
Examining Goals and Effects in Conflict Situations	157	(7)
Instrumental Goals and Effects of Communication in Conflict	158	(1)
Relational Goals and Effects of Communication in a Conflict	159	(2)
Identity Goals and Effects of Communication in Conflict	161	(2)
Interrelationship of the Three Types of Goals and Effects	163	(1)
From Theory to Action	164	(4)
9 Research on Intimacy and Conflict	168	(19)
Objectives	168	(1)
Key Terms	168	(2)
Intimate and Marital Conflict Issues	170	(8)
Relationship Life Cycle, Aging, and Conflict Style	178	(5)
Couple Type and Conflict Styles	178	(2)
Distressed and Nondistressed Couples and Conflict Styles	180	(2)
Couple Complaints and Conflict Style	182	(1)
Family Strengths and Conflict Style	183	(1)
From Theory to Action	183	(4)
PART IV Effective Communication Behavior	187	(86)
10 Using the S-TLC System	189	(17)
Objectives	189	(1)
Key Terms	189	(1)
The S-TLC System	190	(2)
Stop	190	(1)
Think	190	(1)
Listen	191	(1)
Communicate	191	(1)
Thinking about Conflict: Analyzing Conflict Situations	192	(11)
The Goal of Analysis	193	(1)
Dimensions of the Conflict Situation	194	(2)
Conflict Pollutants	196	(2)
Cooperation versus Competition	198	(1)
Trained Incapacities	199	(2)
Models for Analysis	201	(2)
Listening in Conflict Situations	203	(1)
From Theory to Action	204	(2)
11 Choosing among the Communication Options in Conflict Situations	206	(19)
Objectives	206	(1)
Key Terms	206	(1)
Conflict Communication Options	207	(13)
Nonassertive Communication (Avoidance or Accommodation) as an Option	207	(1)
Aggressive Communication as an Option	208	(2)
Nonverbal Aggression (Physical Violence) as an Option	210	(1)
Verbal Aggression as an Option	211	(3)
Passive-Aggressive Communication as an Option	214	(2)
Assertive Communication as an Option	216	(4)
Communication Considerations: Which Conflict Communication Option Is Best?	220	(2)
The Occasion (Including Time and Location)	221	(1)
The Other Person	221	(1)
Your Needs	221	(1)
From Theory to Action	222	(3)
12 Effectively Confronting Others	225	(21)
Objectives	225	(1)
Key Terms	225	(1)
The Interpersonal Conflict Ritual: Six Steps to Successful Confrontation	226	(7)
Preparation: Identify Your Problem, Needs, and Issues	227	(1)
Make a "Date" to Sit Down and Talk	228	(1)
Interpersonal Confrontation: Talk to the Other about Your Problem	228	(4)
Consider Your Partner's Point of View	232	(1)
Resolve the Problem: Make an Agreement	233	(1)
Follow Up on the Solution: Set a Time Limit for Reevaluation	233	(1)
Doing Conflict Messages: Using I-Statements	233	(6)
Components of I-Statements	236	(2)
General Tips on Being Assertive	238	(1)
Advantages of Using I-Statements	238	(1)
Challenges Associated with I-Statements	239	(1)
Dealing with People Who Play Games	239	(1)
Confronting Difficult People	240	(3)
From Theory to Action	243	(3)
13 Cooperative Negotiation in Win-Lose Conflicts	246	(27)
Objectives	246	(1)
Key Terms	246	(1)
Conflicts over Two Types of Resources	247	(3)
Bargaining and Negotiation	250	(6)
The Nature of Bargaining in Formal Situations	250	(2)
Research on Formal Bargaining	252	(2)
Informal Negotiation	254	(1)
Research on Tactics and Strategies in the Negotiation Situation	254	(2)
Strategies for Tangible-Issue Conflicts	256	(14)
Principles of Reconciliation	261	(4)
Separate People from the Problem	265	(1)
Focus on Interests Rather Than Positions	265	(1)
Generate More Options	266	(2)
Base Decisions on Objective Criteria	268	(1)
Converting Competition into Cooperation	268	(2)
From Theory to Action	270	(3)
PART V Escalating and De-Escalating Conflict	273	(68)
14 The Escalation of Conflict: Anger and Stress	274	(19)
Objectives	274	(1)
Key Terms	274	(1)
The Emotion of Anger	275	(6)
General Irritability	275	(1)
Anger as a Secondary Emotion	276	(1)
The Process of Anger	277	(1)
Controlling Anger	278	(1)
Understanding Sources of Anger	279	(2)
Responding to Another's Anger	281	(1)
Containing Escalation	281	(1)
Stress and the Escalation of Conflict	282	(10)
Sources of Stress	284	(4)
Facing the Expected Event	288	(1)
Facing Unexpected Events	288	(1)
Facing Decision-Making Events	289	(1)
Facing a Situation of Competing or Difficult Roles	290	(1)
Ways to Alleviate Stress	291	(1)
From Theory to Action	292	(1)
15 Impression Management in Conflict Situations	293	(22)
Objectives	293	(1)
Key Terms	293	(1)
Understanding the Demands of Face	294	(5)
Defining Face	294	(1)
Positive and Negative Face	295	(1)
Preventing Face Threats	296	(3)
Reasons to Avoid Face Issues in Conflict	299	(1)
Embarrassment as a Face-Threatening Situation	299	(4)
Methods for Correcting One's Impression	303	(9)
Accounts	304	(3)
Apologies	307	(2)
Relationship Outcomes When Accounts and Apologies Are Used	309	(3)
From Theory to Action	312	(3)
16 After the Conflict: Forgiveness and Reconciliation	315	(26)
Objectives	315	(1)
Key Terms	315	(2)
Conflicts and Relational Transgressions	317	(1)
Relational Transgressions	317	(8)
Transgressions and Their Effects	318	(2)
Regrettable Messages	320	(1)
Deception and Lies	320	(4)
When Conflict Turns to Violence	324	(1)
Conflict, Forgiveness, and Reconciliation	325	(13)
Part of the Social Fabric	326	(1)
Why People Don't Forgive or Restore Relationships	327	(2)
What Is Forgiveness?	329	(2)
What Forgiveness Is Not	331	(1)
Strategizing for Forgiveness	332	(1)
The Importance of Creating Reconciliation	333	(3)
Receiving Forgiveness	336	(1)
Moving beyond Victimization	336	(2)
From Theory to Action	338	(3)
Appendix A Mediation as Third-Party Intervention	341	(19)
Setting Disputes through the Intervention of a Third Party	341	(2)
Mediation Compared to Adjudication	343	(2)
Who Are the Mediators?	345	(2)
When Should a Third Party Intervene?	347	(1)
Mediator Skills	348	(1)
Basic Communication Skills	348	(1)
Structuring the Process of Mediation	348	(1)
Reframing the Disputants' Statements and Positions	349	(1)
Expanding the Information Resource	349	(1)
Mediators as Communication Rules Enforcers	349	(1)
The Mediation Process: Step by Step	350	(5)
The Mediator's Opening Statement: Setting the Rules	351	(1)
The Disputants' Opening Statement: Identifying the Issues	352	(1)
Exchange: Clarifying the Issues	352	(1)
Building an Agreement: Identifying Goals	353	(1)
The Written Agreement	354	(1)
The Closing	355	(1)
Code of Ethics	355	(1)
Mediation in Educational Settings	356	(2)
School-Based Mediation Models	356	(1)
College-Based Mediation Models	357	(1)
In Summary	358	(2)
Appendix B Example of a Conflict Assessment	360	(4)
References	364	(17)
Index	381