How Homophobia Hurts Children: Nurturing Diversity at Home, at School, and in the Community

by Baker; Jean M

• ISBN13: 9781560231646
• ISBN10: 1560231645
• eBook ISBN(s): 9781317766391
• Edition: 1st
• Format: Nonspecific Binding
• Copyright: 2001-12-26
• Publisher: Routledge

Summary

Homophobia hurts kids. Explore ways to minimize that trauma! This book illustrates the ways that children growing up to be gay are harmed by homophobia before anyone, including themselves, even knows they are gay. This compelling and sympathetic volume describes many simple ways that these children can be helped to understand that they can grow up to lead normal lives, with hopes and dreams for their futures. How Homophobia Hurts Children: Nurturing Diversity at Home, at School, and in the Community brings home the voices of these children. They describe their experiences to show how they came to the frightening recognition that they are part of a group held in disregard by the rest of society, even sometimes by their own families. Dr. Jean M. Baker, the author of How Homophobia Hurts Children: Nurturing Diversity at Home, at School, and in the Community is a clinical psychologist and the mother of two gay sons. In this book she shares her experience as both psychologist and mother to show how the myths and fallacies about homosexuality have influenced parents, schools, churches, and lawmakers to send children the cruel message that if they are gay, they are not normal and will not be able to lead normal lives. In this unique volume you'll find: a chapter on identity development, following the Eriksonian model interviews with high school students who are self-identified as gay firsthand descriptions of the harassment and victimization of those perceived as gay in schools research on how victimization at school affects gay youths a discussion of the relatively new phenomenon of gay/straight alliances (gay support groups or clubs) a chapter on transgender identity with interviews with four transsexual persons who describe their personal childhood experiences and their transition process The focus of How Homophobia Hurts Children: Nurturing Diversity at Home, at School, and in the Community, centering on the social and familial experiences of children who will grow up to be gay but have not yet come to that realization, is unique. But beyond that, this book also explains how homophobia affects the attitudes of non-gay children by leading them to believe that it is acceptable to mistreat homosexuals. Finally, specific suggestions are made for changes in parenting and changes in school/classroom practices that could help prevent the harm that is inflicted upon so many of our gay children. Everyone who comes in contact with children on their way to becoming gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender adults needs to read this book!

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments	xi
Introduction	xiii
Shame Can Shatter Their Dreams	1	(16)
Homophobia: A Respectable Prejudice	2	(1)
The Gay Rights Movement	2	(1)
The Homosexual Debate: Pathology or Normal Variation?	3	(1)
Growing Up in a Homophobic Culture	4	(3)
What Is It Like to Grow Up Gay?	7	(2)
Adult Attitudes	9	(8)
Myths and Fallacies	17	(14)
Myth: Homosexuality Is a Mental Illness	18	(1)
Myth: Homosexuality Can Be Cured	19	(3)
Myth: Homosexuality Is a Choice	22	(6)
Myth: Homosexuals Are Sexual Molesters	28	(1)
Myth: Homosexuals Will Convert Children to Homosexuality	29	(1)
Myths and Stereotypes Perpetuate Prejudice	30	(1)
Identity Development	31	(14)
Erik Erikson's Stages of Child and Adolescent Development	32	(13)
Coming Out	45	(18)
What Is Coming Out?	45	(1)
Early Childhood Experiences	46	(5)
Coming Out in High School	51	(2)
Coming-Out Models	53	(3)
What Do Youth Say About Coming Out?	56	(7)
Parents and Families Coming Out	63	(12)
Why Should Parents Come Out?	63	(1)
How Do Parents React When They Discover Their Child Is Gay?	64	(1)
What Does Research Show?	65	(1)
Stages of Parental Coming Out	66	(2)
My Own Story	68	(6)
Mary Borhek's Story	74	(1)
For All Parents	75	(10)
To Parents Who Don't Know Whether Their Child Is Gay	75	(3)
Family Reactions to Gay Children Coming Out	78	(4)
Comments	82	(3)
What Happens to Gay Children at School?	85	(10)
Memories of Harassment and Intimidation	85	(3)
What Does Research Show About Harassment of Gays in Schools?	88	(3)
Cultural Permission for Antigay Harassment	91	(1)
The Hidden Gay Students	92	(1)
Intimidation and Harassment May Provoke Violence in Schools	92	(3)
Students Tell Us How Schools Can Help	95	(6)
Actions Schools Can Take	95	(4)
A Gay Football Player Comes Out	99	(2)
How Individuals Within the School System Can Help Gay Students	101	(18)
A Teacher's Coming-Out Story	102	(2)
What Else Can Teachers Do?	104	(3)
What Can School Counselors and School Psychologists Do?	107	(8)
What Can School Administrators and School Boards Do?	115	(4)
Gay Youth Support Groups	119	(16)
Students Speak About the Groups	120	(2)
A School Nurse	122	(2)
An English Teacher	124	(2)
A Chemistry Teacher	126	(3)
A Librarian	129	(6)
A School Climate Survey	135	(10)
Background	135	(1)
Why Students Did or Did Not Intervene	135	(4)
Why Gay Students Would or Would Not Feel Safe in School	139	(2)
Summary	141	(4)
Transcending the Stigma	145	(8)
Are Gays and Lesbians Exceptional?	145	(3)
What's Good About Being Gay?	148	(5)
Enlightened Mayor Seeks Acceptance for Gay Youths	153	(4)
For Mental Health Professionals	157	(4)
Legal and Social Policy Barriers and How They Affect Gay Children	161	(14)
The Right to Marry	161	(3)
Antidiscrimination Legislation	164	(1)
Antidiscrimination Policies in the Schools	165	(3)
Don't Ask, Don't Tell: Gays in the Military	168	(1)
Archaic Sex Laws	169	(1)
Boy Scout Policies	170	(1)
Policies About AIDS	171	(1)
Antigay Hate Crimes	172	(1)
Changing Laws and Policies Can Help Our Gay Children	173	(2)
Transgender Identity	175	(8)
Gender Benders	176	(1)
Transvestites	176	(1)
Androgyne	176	(1)
Transsexuals	177	(3)
Intersexed	180	(1)
Nature versus Nurture Revisited	181	(2)
Personal Stories of Transsexuals Growing Up	183	(18)
Michael (Once Michelle)	183	(3)
Alexander (Once Virginia Allegra)	186	(4)
Mark (Once Vivian)	190	(3)
Jeffrey/Adrianna	193	(4)
Comments	197	(4)
The Tipping Point	201	(6)
References	207	(8)
Index	215