I Need You... Now Go Away! Reclaiming Your Life When Someone You Love Has a Personality Disorder

by Dabney, Laura

• ISBN13: 9781399835220
• ISBN10: 139983522X
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2026-06-09
• Publisher: Sheldon Press
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Summary

Many people find themselves in the same painful relationship patterns-choosing the wrong partners, replaying the same arguments, or feeling misunderstood again and again.  These struggles are not about bad luck or flaws, but about inherited distorted intimacy patterns that have become stuck over time.

Psychiatry sometimes calls these "personality disorders," a term that can sound frightening or insulting.  In reality, it simply points to long-standing ways of relating that can sabotage the very relationships we long for.  And this is true no matter which "side" of the problem you believe you're on: whether you're disrupting closeness, or struggling with someone else's disruptions, change is possible.

With the right therapeutic guidance, people can recognize their patterns, learn healthier ways of connecting, and finally experience the lasting intimacy they long for. If you've noticed the same struggles repeating, know this: change is not only possible - it's within reach.

Author Biography

Dr. Laura Dabney has been a psychiatrist in Virginia Beach, Virginia, for almost twenty-five years. In her psychiatry residency training, she learned to treat people with personality disorders. But it was not until she opened her practice in 2000 and joined a supervision group with other dynamic and analytic therapists that she really started to understand personality disorders in depth and adapt her treatment accordingly.


Dr. Dabney has treated patients in more than a dozen cities across Virginia, including Richmond. Her psychiatric expertise has been featured on radio, podcasts, websites, and in print media including Martha Stewart Weddings, Bustle HuffPost, Travel and Leisure, US News and World Report, and more. She consults for several major institutions, including the Virginia Veterans Administration Medical Center. In addition to receiving her MD, she is board certified in psychiatry and certified in life coaching. She was educated at Eastern Virginia Medical School in Norfolk, Virginia, and still resides in that area with her husband of thirty-three years and near her two grown sons and their families.