Wandering Heart: A Gay Man's Journey : Book Two: Lost Hearts

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  • Format: Paperback
  • Copyright: 2012-02-21
  • Publisher: Author Solutions

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As the only child of troubled parents, author John Loomis was isolated from his peers and grew up shy, bookish, and knowing from a very early age that he was "different" in some serious and unacceptable way. Gradually, he made peace with being gay and continued his search for love, leading to many adventures, much happiness, and some heartbreaks. In this second volume of his memoirs, Loomis continues his life story, describing how his battle with alcoholism and recurring depression made his path more difficult. Wandering Heart: A Gay Man's Journey recalls how he became deeply involved with a strikingly handsome and gifted young man-who soon revealed that he was married, a male prostitute, the son of a well-known actress, and a severe heroin addict. This love affair was carried out against the backdrops of New York, Los Angeles, Miami, New Orleans, London, Paris, the French Riviera, Calcutta, Bangkok, and Rio de Janeiro at Carnival time. Loomis also provides an extensive and personal look into the world of male prostitution. A sometimes tragic and frightening story, Wandering Heart: A Gay Man's Journey exposes some dark and sordid shadows of life and recalls both the desire and the hope that marked his search for love.

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One evening Bert wanted to go to a gay disco. I had heard of a popular disco from friends in New York who visited Paris frequently. We entered the anteroom and then the large main room expectantly. There were full-length mirrors around the room, and Bert took off his shirt and danced with his reflection for about fifteen minutes, his torso glistening with sweat. It was a beautiful display. I was so proud to be with him and felt equally handsome myself, as though he and I were the same person. This was a very pleasant, happy feeling—almost ecstatic, although subliminally I realized it was also a very pathological and dangerous reaction. Most of the other dancers quit dancing so they could watch him. When he finally stopped, the others applauded. He smiled and waved to the crowd—a prince acknowledging his subjects. This seemed very natural and appropriate.

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