The Art of Flourishing

by RUBIN, JEFFREY B. PHD

• ISBN13: 9780307718891
• ISBN10: 0307718891
• Format: Hardcover
• Copyright: 2011-06-07
• Publisher: Harmony

Summary

We all want more love in our lives, especially when the world requires more from us every day. Lasting intimacy-a close and enduring relationship with someone we love who cherishes us-is an indispensable source of strength, resilience, and hope, one that we especially turn to in challenging times. But too often being in an intimate relationship means we have to compromise-or lose-vital aspects of ourselves. How can we avoid sacrificing our own self-care to get the love we want? In this original, surprising, and deeply revealing exploration of the self and relationships, Dr. Jeffrey Rubin brings the art of flourishing to life. The idea is startlingly simple: self-care is the foundation of intimacy, and intimacy is the culmination of self-care. The Art of Flourishing provides the reader with the tools necessary to thrive, to live a life of meaning, passion, and fulfillment. An expert on both Eastern meditative and Western psychotherapeutic traditions, Dr. Rubin draws on the best practices of each to create a new and accessible path to living authentically. His unique synthesis provides a remarkably lucid guide for handling our emotions wisely, discovering our purpose, and uncovering barriers to intimacy-the hidden emotional weeds that kill passion, such as conflicts over communication and power, boundaries and sexuality. Drawing from case examples and personal experiences, Rubin explains how to remove these obstacles to nurture empathy and mutual respect. Creating and cultivating a garden of love enables us to grow as individuals and nourish our connections with others. It widens our horizon of possibility, deepens our humanity, and helps us flourish, which is a priceless gift to the world.

Table of Contents

Introduction	p. 1
Planting the Seeds of Self-Care
Expanding Inner Space	p. 17
They Can't Steal the Moon	p. 34
What Bruce Lee and Carl Jung Can Teach Us about Training for Intimacy	p. 43
Bringing Spirituality Down to Earth	p. 67
Emotional Flourishing: Cultivating Self-Awareness, Empathy, and Wise Action	p. 84
Following Our Passion	p. 112
Discovering Our Purpose	p. 127
Embodying Our Values: Closing the Ethical Gap	p. 147
The Symphony of the Self	p. 161
A Life of One's Own: Authenticity in a World of Spam	p. 184
Cultivating the Garden of Love
The Garden of Love	p. 197
No Winners, No Losers: Expanding Interpersonal Space	p. 222
Composting Interpersonal Conflict	p. 235
Leave the Mind Reading to the Magicians: Learning to Ask for What You Need	p. 248
A Fence around the Garden of Love: Setting Healthy Boundaries	p. 257
The Yoga of Sexuality: Reinvigorating Passion	p. 268
After the Bliss, the Dishes (and Only I Know How to Load Them): Negotiating Power and Control	p. 278
Torn Checks and Chinese Doctors: Skillfully Handling Oppositionality	p. 292
Scorched-Earth Moments: Surviving Hateful Feelings	p. 300
When It's Not Really Over: Recognizing the Green Shoots in a Withered Garden	p. 308
Epilogue: Toward Flourishing	p. 318
Acknowledgments	p. 321
Notes	p. 323
Index	p. 331
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