A Decembered Grief: Living With Loss While Others Are Celebrating

by Smith, Harold Ivan

• ISBN13: 9780834127265
• ISBN10: 0834127261
• Edition: Gift
• Format: Hardcover
• Copyright: 2011-09-15
• Publisher: Nazarene Pub House

Summary

Suffering the loss of a loved one at any time of the year is difficult. Yet, during the holidays or special occasions those grieving experience a more intense sense of loss.With keen perception, A Decembered Grief provides illustrations and insights for those facing grief-impacted holidays and emphasizes God's ability to transform the season into a time of grace and healing.

Author Biography

Harold Ivan Smith is a grief specialist on the teaching faculties of Saint Luke's Hospital, Kansas City, Missouri, and the Carondolet Medical Institute in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. He is recognized as a Fellow in Thanatology by the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEG). He has also received the Distinguished Service Award from ADEC. He earned his doctorate from Asbury Theological Semi-nary and an Eds from Vanderbilt. His primary research is on the grief of U.S. Presidents and First Ladies. He has facilitated Grief Gatherings, storytelling groups for grievers, at Saint Luke's Hospital for more than fifteen years.

Table of Contents

Foreword	p. 11
Introduction	p. 13
AlterùRather than AbandonùTraditions	p. 18
Anticipate the Holidays	p. 20
Appreciate the Grief Styles and Decisions of Others	p. 22
Ask Your Church for Help	p. 24
Be Alert to the Culture's Obsession with Excitement	p. 26
Befriend Your Grief	p. 28
Befuddle Someone	p. 30
Carolize Your Season	p. 32
Celebrate Sensitively	p. 36
Consider .the Needs of Everyone	p. 38
Create New Traditions	p. 40
Create Ornaments or Decorations That Symbolize Your Loved One and Eternal Life	p. 42
Cry If You Want To	p. 44
Define Your Boundaries	p. 46
Do What You Need to Do	p. 48
Donate to Your Church or a Charity in Honor of Your Loved One	p. 50
Do Not Fast-Forward to January 5	p. 52
Forgive Those You Believe Are Responsible for the Death	p. 54
Give Your Grief Its Voice	p. 56
Give Yourself Permission to Say, "No," or "IÆll Pass"	p. 58
Guard Your Heart	p. 60
Invite God's Help	p. 62
Journal Your Grief	p. 64
Keep the Future in Mind	p. 66
Let Others In on Your Grief	p. 68
Make Gratitude	p. 70
Minimize the Seasonal Stressors	p. 72
Miss the Invitations to Parties and Other Social Events	p. 74
Nap	p. 76
Network with Other Grievers	p. 78
Nurture Yourself	p. 80
Observe a Quiet Holy Day	p. 82
Organize Your Living Environment	p. 84
Prepare	p. 86
Read	p. 88
Remain Open to Seasonal Surprises	p. 90
Remember Realistically	p. 92
Resist the Temptation to Make It Up to Others for What They've Been Through	p. 94
Rethink Your Holiday Shopping Habits	p. 96
Say Your Loved One's Name	p. 98
Toast Your Loved One	p. 100
Try Events	p. 102
Unplug the Christmas Mania	p. 104
Use Some of Your Seasonal Decoration	p. 106
Visit the Cemetery or Scattering Ground	p. 108
Volunteer at a Social Service Agency	p. 110
Vote Your Choices	p. 112
Watch Children	p. 114
Watch Out for Numbing Influences	p. 116
Weigh Any Criticism of Your Grief Style and Holiday Decisions	p. 118
Worship	p. 120
Write a Year-End Letter to Your Deceased Loved One	p. 122
"Yes" Invitations That Feet Right	p. 124
"Zestize" Your Season	p. 126
How to Pray This Holiday Season	p. 128
Conclusion	p. 130
Memories of My Loved One	p. 133
Appendix	p. 137
Works Cited	p. 139
About the Author	p. 142
Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved.