Introduction: Til Death Do Us Part Is a Really Long Time | p. ix |
Can We Talk? Obviously Not | p. 1 |
Sleep in Heavenly Peace, My Ass | p. 21 |
"I Was Watching That!": Life with the Cable Guy | p. 37 |
What's Cooking? (]'m Gonna Go Out on a Limb and Say Me) | p. 53 |
Domestic Bliss and Other Big Fat Lies | p. 69 |
Gee, Honey. Are You Sick? I Never Would Have Guessed | p. 83 |
The View from the Passenger Seat. . . Sucks | p. 97 |
Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw? | p. 111 |
It's Only Money, Honey | p. 127 |
It's My Potty and I'll Cry If I Want To | p. 141 |
Should We Just Skip the $200 Dinner and Duke It Out at Home? | p. 155 |
It's the Thought That Counts (but Thanks for the Blender!) | p. 169 |
If It's Broken . . . Please God, Don't Fix It | p. 183 |
Friends and Family: Not Just a Phone Plan | p. 197 |
If You Build It, There Will Be Many, Many Arguments | p. 209 |
Are You in or Are You Out? | p. 223 |
Vacation: All I Ever Wanted | p. 237 |
He Can't Help It, He's a Guy | p. 251 |
You're Merely the Sperm Donor, Dear | p. 263 |
See? It Really Could Be Worse | p. 279 |
afterword: Famous Last Words | p. 295 |
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