Fells Wedding Planner

by Gilbert, Edith

• ISBN13: 9780883910078
• ISBN10: 0883910071
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2000-01-01
• Publisher: Frederick Fell Publishers

Summary

A handbook on planning the wedding ceremony and reception includes discussions of budgeting, invitations, the gift registry, flowers, and the choice of a photographer.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments	p. v
Revisions	p. vii
How to Use This Book Wisely	p. xxiii
Getting Off to a Good Start
Accept Help When Offered	p. 3
Assign Honor Roles	p. 4
The Marriage License	p. 4
Making Decisions	p. 5
Hasty Decisions	p. 5
What to Call Your In-Laws	p. 6
The Engagement, Showers and Prewedding Parties
The Engagement Ring	p. 10
Insurance	p. 11
Rings for a Second Marriage	p. 12
Engraving the Wedding Band	p. 12
Announcing the Engagement to the Family	p. 12
Engagement Parties	p. 13
Second Marriage	p. 14
Newspaper Announcements and Photos	p. 14
Photographs	p. 17
When Engagements Are Ended	p. 17
Joint Checking Accounts	p. 17
Bridal Showers and Parties	p. 18
Who Gives a Shower?	p. 18
Who Is Invited?	p. 18
Planning a Shower	p. 19
The Bride's Responsibilities	p. 19
The Game Plan	p. 19
The Couple's Shower	p. 20
A Bridesmaids Party	p. 20
The Bachelor Party	p. 21
The Rehearsal Dinner	p. 21
Place Cards	p. 22
Family Receptions Before or After the Wedding	p. 23
Parties for Out-of-Town Guests	p. 24
The Afterglow	p. 24
Prewedding and Afterglow Party Suggestions	p. 25
Preparing for Marriage
Premarital Counseling	p. 29
Group Discussions and Seminars	p. 31
Difficult Decisions	p. 31
Prenuptial Agreements	p. 34
Marriage Blessing	p. 35
The Wedding Budget and Calendar
A Breakdown of Wedding Expenses	p. 39
Wedding Obligations and Expenses	p. 40
The Bride and Her Family	p. 40
The Groom and His Family	p. 41
Bridesmaid's Expenses	p. 42
Groomsmen's and Usher's Expenses	p. 42
Guests' Expenses	p. 42
Clergyperson's Fee	p. 42
The Professional Wedding Coordinator	p. 43
Tipping	p. 44
The Bride and Groom's Calendar	p. 45
As Soon As Possible	p. 45
Six Months before the Wedding	p. 45
Two or Three Months before the Wedding	p. 46
One Month or Six Weeks before the Wedding	p. 46
One Week before the Wedding	p. 47
The Day before the Wedding	p. 47
The Day of the Wedding	p. 47
After the Wedding Day	p. 47
After the Honeymoon	p. 47
Planning the Wedding and Honeymoon
Early Decisions	p. 49
A Religious or Civil Ceremony Site	p. 50
Wedding Sites	p. 50
Home Weddings	p. 51
Church or Synagogue Weddings	p. 52
Clubs, Halls, or Rented Sites	p. 52
Garden Weddings	p. 52
Tents	p. 52
Exceptional Wedding Sites	p. 53
Shipboard Weddings	p. 54
Picturesque Wedding Sites	p. 54
Venice and Other Foreign Places	p. 56
Passports and Travel Documents	p. 56
Theme Weddings	p. 57
Ethnic Wedding Themes	p. 57
Seasonal and Other Wedding Themes	p. 57
Setting the Date	p. 58
The Time of Day	p. 59
The Guest List	p. 59
Coworkers and Acquaintances	p. 59
When Parents Host the Wedding	p. 60
Children at the Ceremony and Reception	p. 61
Special Guests	p. 61
Persons with Handicaps	p. 62
Security Guard	p. 62
Cancellations	p. 62
Sending Invitations in Waves	p. 62
The Final Guest List	p. 63
Computer Files and File Cards	p. 63
The Honeymoon	p. 63
Planning the Reception
When There Is No Reception	p. 67
Reception at Church or Synagogue	p. 68
Private Reception	p. 68
Informal Home Reception	p. 68
Buffet versus Seated Meal	p. 69
Seating and Spacing	p. 70
Service	p. 71
Diagonal Stripe Napkin Fold	p. 72
Party Rental Stores	p. 72
The Wedding Cake	p. 73
The Groom's Cake	p. 75
Getting It All in Writing	p. 75
The Date and Hours	p. 76
The Service	p. 76
The Food	p. 76
The Liquor	p. 77
The Tables	p. 77
The Price	p. 77
Selecting the Right Room	p. 77
Caterers	p. 78
Alcoholic and Nonalcoholic Beverages	p. 79
Nonalcoholic Punch Recipe	p. 79
Alcoholic Punch Recipe	p. 80
Beer	p. 81
Champagne	p. 82
The Open Bar	p. 82
Tray Service	p. 82
How Many Bottles?	p. 82
Step Savers	p. 83
Planning the Entire Menu	p. 83
Menu Ideas for a Traditional Daytime Reception	p. 85
Refreshments: Canapes and Finger Sandwiches	p. 85
Wedding Brunches	p. 86
Buffet Style	p. 86
A Seated Wedding Brunch	p. 87
A Wedding Luncheon	p. 87
Suggested Menus	p. 87
Seated Luncheon	p. 87
Menu One	p. 87
Menu Two	p. 87
Summer Buffet Supper	p. 88
Seated Formal Dinner	p. 88
Stationery
The Guest List	p. 91
Addressing Invitations	p. 91
Duplicate Master Guest List	p. 92
Friends of Guests	p. 92
Invitations, Announcements, Informals	p. 92
The Informal Home Wedding	p. 93
Original Artwork	p. 94
Calligraphy	p. 94
Ordering Wedding Stationery	p. 95
Printing Processes	p. 95
Coat of Arms	p. 96
When to Order and Mail	p. 96
Proofreading	p. 96
Stamps	p. 96
The Inner and Outer Envelope	p. 97
Return Address	p. 99
Wording of Invitations and Announcements	p. 99
Choice of Menu	p. 100
Who Is Hosting the Wedding	p. 101
Parents of the Bride	p. 101
Parents of the Bride and Groom	p. 102
If the Bride's Mother Is Widowed	p. 102
If the Bride's Mother Is Divorced	p. 102
If the Bride's Mother Is Remarried	p. 103
If the Bride's Divorced Parents Are Both Remarried and Are Cohosting the Wedding	p. 103
If the Bride's Father Is a Widower	p. 104
If the Bride's Father Is a Remarried Widower	p. 104
If a Young Bride Is Marrying for the Second Time	p. 105
Military Titles	p. 105
Other Titles	p. 108
When the Groom's Family Hosts the Wedding	p. 110
Invitations by Both the Bride's and Groom's Parents	p. 110
Foreign Countries	p. 111
Double Weddings	p. 112
Your Own Invitations	p. 112
Out-of-Town Receptions by Parents	p. 113
Additional Information	p. 115
In Case of Rain	p. 115
For a Catholic Wedding	p. 115
Insert Cards	p. 115
Reception Invitation	p. 115
The Response Card	p. 116
What about the Kids?	p. 117
The Address on the Response Envelope	p. 119
Pew Cards	p. 119
At-Home Cards	p. 119
Wedding Announcements	p. 120
A Death in the Immediate Family	p. 123
Multipurpose Informals	p. 124
Wedding Program	p. 124
Wedding Weekend Guide	p. 126
Printed Souvenir Menus	p. 127
Printed Acknowledgment Cards	p. 127
Thank-You Notes	p. 127
Determining Names after Marriage	p. 129
Taking the Groom's Surname	p. 129
Other Options	p. 129
Keeping Your Own Name	p. 129
Changing Your Middle Name	p. 130
Hyphenated Names	p. 131
Taking the Bride's Surname	p. 131
Save-the-Date Letters	p. 131
Checklist of Choices for Stationery Trousseau	p. 132
Wedding Invitations	p. 132
Wedding Announcements	p. 132
Wedding Program	p. 132
Multipurpose Informals or Thank-You Notes	p. 132
Place Cards	p. 132
Souvenir Menus	p. 133
Wedding Party Guide	p. 133
Attendants in the Wedding Party
Choosing Your Attendants	p. 135
New Trends	p. 136
A Word of Caution	p. 137
The Duties of the Maid or Matron of Honor	p. 137
The Duties of the Best Man	p. 138
The Informal Wedding	p. 140
The Semiformal Wedding	p. 140
Bridesmaids	p. 140
Groomsmen and Ushers	p. 141
The Formal Wedding	p. 142
Children's Roles	p. 143
Children's Roles in a Second Marriage	p. 143
The Flower Girl	p. 144
The Ring Bearer	p. 144
Pages or Train Bearers	p. 145
Junior Groomsmen, Junior Bridesmaids, and Candle Lighters	p. 145
Pets	p. 145
What to Wear
Dress for the Wedding Party	p. 147
Dressing in Harmony	p. 147
Terms Describing Formality	p. 148
The Wedding Gown	p. 149
The Pregnant Bride	p. 151
The Second Time Around	p. 151
Preserving the Gown	p. 151
The Train	p. 152
The Veil	p. 152
Gloves for the Bride	p. 152
Hairstyles	p. 153
Bride's Attendants	p. 153
Junior Bridesmaids, Flower Girls, and Ring Bearers	p. 154
Mothers of the Bride and Groom	p. 155
Fathers of the Bride and Groom	p. 155
Purchasing a Tuxedo	p. 155
Men's Formal Rental Clothing	p. 157
Elements of Men's Formalwear	p. 160
Tuxedo	p. 160
Shirt	p. 160
Bow Tie	p. 160
Suspenders	p. 160
Vest	p. 161
Cummerbund	p. 161
Ascot	p. 161
Gloves	p. 161
Studs and Cuff Links	p. 161
Shoes	p. 161
Dress for the Informal Wedding	p. 162
Dress for the Semiformal Wedding	p. 162
The Most Formal Wedding	p. 163
The Military Wedding	p. 163
Flowers
Flowers in Season	p. 165
The Professional Florist	p. 166
Nonprofessional Help	p. 166
Flowers in a Church or Synagogue	p. 167
The Huppah	p. 169
For a Very Small Wedding	p. 169
The Aisle Runner	p. 169
Flowers in a Private Indoor Setting	p. 169
Flowers in a Private Outdoor Setting	p. 170
Other Outdoor Decorations	p. 170
Floral Centerpieces at the Reception	p. 170
Flowers for Members of the Wedding Party	p. 171
The Bridal Bouquet	p. 171
The Bridesmaid's Flowers	p. 173
Headdresses	p. 173
Maid or Matron of Honor	p. 173
The Groom, Groomsmen, Ushers, and Fathers	p. 174
The Flower Girl	p. 174
Mothers and Grandmothers	p. 174
The Sound of Music
Music for the Ceremony	p. 177
Selecting Music	p. 178
Selecting Musicians	p. 178
Hiring Musicians	p. 179
Music for a Ceremony in a House of Worship	p. 179
The Prelude	p. 179
The Processional	p. 180
During the Ceremony	p. 181
The Recessional	p. 181
Music for a Second Wedding	p. 181
Music for a Ceremony in a Private Setting	p. 182
Recording the Ceremony Music on Tape	p. 182
Music for the Reception	p. 182
Live Music	p. 182
Disc Jockey	p. 183
Electrical Wiring at a Home Reception	p. 184
Photographs and Videotapes
Photographs	p. 187
Choosing a Photographer	p. 187
Possible Photographs	p. 189
Photos Before the Ceremony	p. 190
Photos in Church	p. 190
Photos at the Reception	p. 190
Disposable Cameras	p. 190
Amateur Photographers	p. 190
Videotapes	p. 192
To Tape or Not to Tape	p. 192
What to Tape	p. 192
Editing	p. 193
Budget	p. 194
Videotaping Still Photographs	p. 194
Newspaper Photographs	p. 195
Makeup	p. 195
Eyeglasses	p. 196
Gifts
Gift Registry	p. 199
The Consultant	p. 200
Choosing Patterns and Styles	p. 201
The Second Time Around	p. 202
Money! Money! Money!	p. 203
Registering at a Travel Agency	p. 203
Sharing the Pleasure	p. 203
Displaying Gifts	p. 203
Insuring Gifts	p. 204
Broken Gifts	p. 204
Missing Gift Cards	p. 205
Monogramming and Engraving	p. 205
Gifts for the Wedding Party	p. 206
For the Bride's Attendants	p. 206
For the Groom's Attendants	p. 207
Exchange of Gifts by the Bride and Groom	p. 207
Gifts for Children from a Previous Marriage	p. 207
Favors	p. 207
Transportation
Maps	p. 212
Special Transportation Cards	p. 212
Who Leaves Home First?	p. 212
Transportation Choices	p. 213
Friends May Help	p. 214
Valet Parking	p. 214
Decorating the Newlyweds' Car	p. 214
The Rehearsal and Ceremony
The Rehearsal	p. 217
Before the Rehearsal	p. 218
Aisles	p. 218
Directing the Rehearsal	p. 218
Children in the Wedding Party	p. 219
After the Rehearsal	p. 219
The Christian Wedding	p. 220
The Processional	p. 220
The Ceremony	p. 222
The Unity Candle	p. 223
The End of the Ceremony	p. 223
The Recessional	p. 223
The Roman Catholic Wedding	p. 225
The Orthodox Christian Wedding	p. 225
The Quaker Wedding	p. 226
The Christian Science Wedding	p. 227
The Mormon Wedding	p. 227
The Filipino Wedding	p. 227
The Jewish Wedding	p. 229
The Processional and Ceremony	p. 229
The End of the Ceremony	p. 230
The Recessional	p. 230
Music	p. 230
The Chinese Wedding	p. 230
The Engagement Ceremony	p. 230
The Wedding Ceremony and Banquet	p. 232
The Japanese Wedding	p. 232
The African-American Wedding	p. 233
The Baha'i Wedding	p. 234
The Ecumenical or Interfaith Wedding	p. 234
For More Information	p. 234
The Wedding Day
Assembling and Preparing	p. 237
At the Ceremony Site	p. 238
The First to Arrive	p. 239
Seating Parents	p. 239
Aisle Runner and Ribbons	p. 239
The Processional	p. 240
At the Altar	p. 240
The Ceremony	p. 240
The Bride's Bouquet	p. 240
The Exchange of Rings	p. 240
The Kiss	p. 241
The Recessional	p. 241
After the Ceremony	p. 241
Formal Photographs	p. 241
Wedding Bells	p. 242
At the Reception Site	p. 242
The Receiving Line	p. 242
Choosing a Location	p. 242
A Mother Receives	p. 242
A Father Receives	p. 243
Stepparents and Biological Parents	p. 243
The Bride and Groom Receive	p. 244
No Receiving Line	p. 244
The Guest Book	p. 244
Gifts	p. 244
Seating	p. 245
The Informal Reception	p. 245
The Formal Reception	p. 245
Place Cards	p. 246
Dancing	p. 247
The First Dance	p. 247
Ethnic Dances	p. 247
Toasting	p. 248
Tapping Glasses	p. 250
Cutting the Wedding Cake	p. 250
Tossing the Bouquet and Garter	p. 252
The Newlyweds' Departure	p. 252
Wedding-Weekend Checklist	p. 252
After the Wedding	p. 257
Parting Words for the Bride and Groom	p. 257
Wedding Customs	p. 259
Recommended Resources	p. 269
Glossary	p. 271
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