Girltalk: All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You

by Weston, Carol

• ISBN13: 9780060585754
• ISBN10: 0060585757
• Edition: 4th
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2004-07-01
• Publisher: Perennial

Summary

Upbeat and up to date, this essential sourcebook for girls is revised by Weston, now the Dear Carol columnist for "Girl's Life" magazine, who offers solid, sensible, and caring advice as well as facts, hotlines, Web sites, and quizzes.

Table of Contents

Hello	p. xv
Body: Looking and Feeling Your Best	p. 1
Do Guys Worry About Their Bodies?	p. 2
Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Breasts	p. 3
Is Your Period a Question Mark?	p. 8
The Right Height	p. 16
Excited About Exercise	p. 17
Healthy Eating	p. 19
Don't Window-Shop at the Bakery and Forty-nine Other Dos and Don'ts	p. 21
Eating Disorders: Dying to Be Thin	p. 26
Body Sweat, Body Smells	p. 31
Skin Care (Sun Goddesses, Beware!)	p. 32
A Nose Is a Nose Is a Nose and All About Ears	p. 36
Eye Deal	p. 38
Ignore Your Teeth and They'll Go Away	p. 39
Hair Care	p. 41
Nice Nails	p. 44
Makeup and Clothes	p. 45
Even Beautiful Girls Get the Blues	p. 47
Sleep Tight (Waking Up Is Hard to Do)	p. 48
Mono and Your Health	p. 49
Physical Disabilities	p. 51
Speaking of Body Language	p. 53
Dear Carol...	p. 54
Friendship: You Don't Like Everybody: Why Should Everybody Like You?	p. 66
Girlfriends Last Longer Than Boyfriends	p. 67
Ten Ways to Make Friends	p. 68
The Pursuit of Popularity	p. 75
Your Friends Don't All Have to Like Each Other	p. 77
Can a Guy Be a Friend?	p. 78
Fights and Friends	p. 79
Staying Friends	p. 81
Telephone Tactics	p. 82
Being a Good Guest	p. 86
When Friendships Change	p. 88
Ten Ways to Lose Friends	p. 90
Be Your Own Friend	p. 91
Dear Carol...	p. 94
Love: Falling In, Falling Out	p. 105
Getting Started	p. 106
Sending Out Signals	p. 108
On Your Mark, Get Set--Relax!	p. 111
Icebreakers: Twenty-three Ways to Launch a Conversation	p. 112
Is Cupid Stupid, or Does He Just Have Poor Aim?	p. 114
Should You Go Out with Older and Younger Guys?	p. 116
Should You Go Out with Someone from a Different Background?	p. 117
Saying No Nicely	p. 118
Twenty-eight Things to Do Besides Meet at the Mall	p. 120
The Way to a Guy's Heart Just Might Be My Cheesecake	p. 122
Nine Awkward Situations and How to Handle Them	p. 123
Eleven Surefire Ways to Ruin a Romance	p. 128
Breaking Up Without Breaking Down	p. 131
Lasting Love	p. 135
Love Notes	p. 138
Kissing, Etc.	p. 141
Dear Carol...	p. 142
Sex: What You Should Know Before Saying Yes	p. 154
To Do It or Not to Do It: That Is the Question	p. 154
Talking to Parents about S-E-X	p. 158
Do-It-Yourself Orgasms	p. 160
Sex? Who Me?	p. 161
True Confessions: My First Time	p. 162
It's Easy to Get Pregnant; It's Easy Not To	p. 163
Fooling Around	p. 167
Birth Control Methods	p. 168
What If You Are Pregnant?	p. 179
Quick Quiz on Prom Pressures	p. 186
Straight, Gay, Bi: Sexual Orientation	p. 189
STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections)	p. 192
HIV and AIDS	p. 197
No-Fun Nuisances (That Aren't STIs)	p. 200
Rape	p. 202
Incest	p. 209
Dear Carol...	p. 211
Family: Making the Best of Your Nest	p. 222
Problems with Parents	p. 223
Parents with Problems	p. 235
You're Crazy If You Need Counseling and Don't Seek It	p. 242
Teen Suicide	p. 245
Brothers and Sisters	p. 247
Stepparents and Stepsiblings: Step by Step	p. 254
Relatives in the Parlor and Skeletons in the Closet	p. 257
When Loved Ones Die	p. 258
Dear Carol...	p. 263
Education: Getting Through High School, Getting into College	p. 277
Is School Unbeatable or Unbearable?	p. 278
Why Should You Learn All That Irrelevant Stuff Anyway?	p. 279
Cram Course in Study Habits	p. 280
Learning Differences: You Know You're Smart But...	p. 287
Teachers: They're Not in It for the Money	p. 289
When You Need a Change (School or Summer)	p. 293
College: Choosing and Getting Chosen	p. 299
Dear Carol...	p. 314
Money: The Buck Starts Here	p. 326
Be a Better (and Better-Paid) Baby-sitter	p. 327
Beyond Baby-sitting (but Before the Big Time)	p. 330
All in the Family	p. 332
Figuring Out Your Future	p. 334
Writing a Resume	p. 338
Acing the Interview	p. 341
Networking	p. 343
Once You're Hired, Don't Get Fired--or Should You Quit?	p. 344
When to Be Cheap, When Not to Be Cheap	p. 345
Money Miscellany	p. 348
Dear Carol...	p. 351
Smoking, Drinking, and Drugs: And I Promise Not to Preach	p. 357
Tobacco: When It's Good to Be a Quitter	p. 358
Thinking About Drinking	p. 366
Alcoholism	p. 374
Drunk Driving	p. 377
Illegal Drugs	p. 379
Dear Carol...	p. 389
A Quartet of Quizzes: Getting to Know You	p. 398
Are You Too Nice?	p. 398
How Well Do You Know Your Best Friend?	p. 404
Are You and He a Good Match?	p. 408
Are You the Jealous Type?	p. 415
Goodbye	p. 421
Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved.

Excerpts

Girltalk Fourth Edition
All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You

Chapter One

Looking and Feeling Your Best

Too fat, too flat, too tall, too small—are you 100 percent happywith your appearance? Hardly anyone is. It's especially hard now.Your body may be growing in all directions, blemishes may freckleyour face, hair may be sprouting here and there, your period maybe a mystery. What is going on inside you anyway? Are you stuckwith your features and figure?

Looks make a difference in first impressions. But so do friendliness,intelligence, thoughtfulness, and a sense of humor. Andwith a little effort, anybody can look attractive.

Since you and your body are together for the long haul, youneed to learn to take care of it. This chapter is about how to beyour most healthy and radiant.

Do Guys Worry About Their Bodies?

Before we launch into a discourse about breasts and periods, youmight be wondering if guys ever worry about their bodies. Answer:They do.

Sure, a few wink in the mirror each morning and think they'reGod's Gift to Manhood—and Womankind. But most wrestle withpuberty-related anxiety.

Guys wonder whether they're tall enough, whether their pecsand biceps bulge enough, whether their chest, facial, and pubichair will ever grow. They wish their voices would get deeper andstop croaking. They're tired of having braces and pimples and feelingclumsy and gangly and hungry all the time. They wish theywere more handsome and that their hands wouldn't sweat whenthey ask you to slow dance.

Guys worry extra in gym showers, locker rooms, and bathroomsbecause they figure someone might be checking out theirprivate parts. And someone probably is! Guys don't just worryabout size; some even worry that their organ is crooked!

Here's another male concern: wet dreams. Guys your agesometimes wake up to find they've ejaculated during the night,and they wonder if that's normal. Yes. It's also normal for guys toget erections at odd times—in the morning, in math class, or evenwhen taking a foul shot in basketball.

Many guys feel uneasy about their sexuality. Are they oversexedif they masturbate a lot, undersexed if they don't? If they have anorgasm quickly when they masturbate, does that mean they'll bepremature ejaculators in years to come? If they haven't started dating,or if they've played sex games with other guys or admire theirmale coach, does that mean they're gay? If they have an X-ratedfantasy involving a married woman teacher, does that mean they'retwisted? No, no, no, and no. Guys grow at different sexual speedsand need not be worried by early imaginings or experiences.

In one important way, girls have an advantage over guys in theWorry Department. Most guys don't discuss their growing pains,whereas, luckily for us, most girls do. It's not uncommon for a girlto complain, "I wish my breasts were bigger." But find me a guywho would say, "I wish my penis were bigger." It's a shame guysaren't more open and honest together. They have as many questions,troubles, and fears as girls, but fewer outlets. Guys tease andtaunt each other, yet tend to fret alone. They don't even have manymagazines or books to consult. But you do. So keep reading!

Everything You Ever Wanted to KnowAbout Breasts

Back to us girls.

If you're like me, you sometimes get fed up with your figure.Why can't your breasts be medium instead of mountains or molehills?

It's frustrating that your body's timetable answers to hormonesand heredity, rather than to your own wishful thinking. If youhaven't started developing yet, you may be feeling shortchanged. Ifyou've been developing for years, you may worry you'll wind upwith watermelons. Either way, you might envy the average girls whostrut around the locker room parading their bra-and-panty sets.

I envied them. I was in a mad rush to grow up. I couldn't waitto get my breasts on and my braces off, to start getting periods andstop getting pimples. At 14, I was a restless late-blooming flatso. Idressed behind curtains and cringed at breast jokes.

Why are you a sailor's delight? Because you have a sunkenchest! What do members of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee wearinstead of bras? Band-Aids! Pretend you're a boy for a minute.Ahh . . . doesn't that take a load off your chest? Poor Rebecca, girlssaid, was so flat she could wear her bra inside out. And peopleteased Sophie that she'd knock down passersby if she turned without warning.

At first hardly anybody was happy. My friend Ali was as distressedabout being busty as I was about being flat. She sportedbaggy shirts to hide her dramatic décolletage.

It was Ali who told me of the Best Breast Test. "To find out ifyou need a bra, place a pencil underneath one of your boobs andsee if it stays up," she explained. I ducked into the bathroom . . .and my pencil clattered to the floor. Ali handed me two of heroutgrown bras anyway—"booby" prizes, since she'd graduated tolarger sizes. I still couldn't imagine putting them on, however. Astringbean classmate had worn a bra to a party the previous weekendand a boy had jeered, "Would you wear shoes if you didn'thave feet?"

Status was at stake when we discussed bra sizes. The idealseemed to be As in school and Bs in bust. I earned no grade: justan incomplete. Later when the subject switched to boys, books,baby-sitting...

Girltalk Fourth Edition
All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You. Copyright © by Carol Weston. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.

---

Excerpted from Girltalk: All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You by Carol Weston
All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.