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There are nearly seven billion people on the planet and the cards are always shuffling. People are in and out of relationships all the time. No matter what your age and where you live, there is someone out there for you.
Work on Yourself from the Inside Out
Lao Tzu said, "Be really whole and all things will come to you."
I love to quote this because if you are truly yourself, fully and completely, then there is no doubt you will magnetize the perfect person for you. However, if you are still hiding behind masks and armor, then you are obviously going to attract people who have similar pretenses.
So work up the courage to improve yourself and do everything you can to work through any old issues that you still have left over from when you were a child. These issues can manifest themselves as unwanted behaviors or unworkable beliefs that you have copied from your parents, siblings, peers, teachers or any other parental figure in your past. Or equally they could be behaviors and beliefs that at the time were useful to adopt to help protect you from people or circumstances that made you feel unsafe.
These old behaviors may have been effective and kept you safe years ago, but they are not serving you now. In fact, they are most likely preventing you from growing and it is time to let them go. As you do so, you can discover who you really are, what you are meant to do in your life and who you are meant to magnetize toward you. You are already whole and complete; it is now a matter of shedding masks and releasing armor so that you can express your unique, empowered and original nature—which is essential for attracting long-lasting love!
With all this in mind let's start by looking at your relationship patterns. Do you have a habit of getting involved with someone and then ending the relationship right around three months because you have a deep childhood fear of not feeling free? Perhaps you have a habit of moving too quickly, and you try to imagine your future together after the second date for fear of being abandoned, because one of your parents left or wasn't around when you were young. Or maybe you overreact when you get upset or withdraw when someone says something you don't like, because that has always been your way of coping. All these are learned patterns and ways of protecting yourself. Now is the perfect time to work on yourself to let go of these old ways so that you can reap the benefits and rewards later on by attracting a similarly open, honest and maskless person. (Like attracts like!)
Let Go of Your Secrets
Release the close-guarded secrets that you are terrified that someone might find out about you if they get too close. Whether it is that you are bad with money, sweat a lot, were in an unhealthy or abusive relationship or were bullied at school, you need to let these sorts of things go rather than hide them and let them eat you up.
We all have things in our past that we are embarrassed about or might feel shameful of, so don't think you are alone. At twenty-one I was in a self-development training class where the trainees were all sitting in a circle and the trainer kept asking, "Secrets, who has secrets?" For hours we were in that room as I and the other participants stood up at various intervals and confessed secrets that we had held inside for so long for fear that if we told anyone about them, they would seem so big and shocking that that person would have a lesser opinion of us. But by keeping them close to our chests, we allowed these skeletons in the closet to eat us up. Many of us thought that we were alone in the secrets that we kept, but during this exercise we all recognized that many of us shared similar ones!
In my life coaching practice I have taught CEOs, celebrities and everyday people, and regardless of social and financial situations, I have found that we all have similar issues to varying degrees.
It's easy to try and shove things under the carpet, but they always manage to find a way to rear their heads at one point or another. The truer you can possibly be to who you really are, the greater the reward you will have with the partner that you attract.
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