Are Your Parents Driving You Crazy? : How to Resolve the Most Common Dilemmas with Aging Parents

by Ilardo, Joseph A.; Rothman, Carole R., Ph.D.

• ISBN13: 9781889242149
• ISBN10: 1889242144
• Edition: 1st
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2001-04-01
• Publisher: Natl Book Network

Summary

Practical guide for people whose parents are still competent and on their own but showing signs of aging-like they should stop driving but won't, etc.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments	ix
Introduction	xi
The Context
Harsh (and Not So Harsh) Realities	3	(8)
Talk So Your Parents Will Listen, and Listen So Your Parents Will Talk	11	(6)
At an Impasse?	17	(4)
S.U.R.V.I.V.E.	21	(24)
The Model
Solve the Problems That Are Driving You Crazy	29	(16)
The Dilemmas
My father can no longer drive safely, but he refuses to stop	45	(9)
My mother antagonizes her aide	54	(6)
My brother and sister won't offer to help take care of Mom and Dad	60	(7)
My mother clearly needs to see a doctor, but she refuses to do so	67	(7)
My mother is not poor, but she skimps to save money	74	(6)
My sisters argue constantly about taking care of our parents, and everyone calls me for help	80	(9)
My 82-year-old father wants to marry a woman he just met	89	(8)
My mother is doing fine, but she won't listen to her doctor's advice	97	(6)
My husband resents my father's demands on me	103	(7)
My mother won't discuss end-of-life issues	110	(8)
My mother can't manage her checking account any longer, but she refuses my help	118	(7)
My sister volunteered to take care of my mother, and now she refuses to let me help	125	(6)
My father refuses to wear his hearing aids, even though he insisted on getting them	131	(6)
My mother treats my brother like a god, but I'm the one who does all the work	137	(7)
My father wants to move in with us, but my husband is against it	144	(6)
My father insists on taking care of my mother, but he is not able to, and they both are suffering	150	(8)
My parents fight like cats and dogs, and now my mother won't take care of my father	158	(7)
My brother and I disagree with our stepmother about putting my father on life support	165	(8)
My mother is going to a doctor I think is a quack, but she refuses to stop seeing him	173	(6)
My father's public behavior embarrasses me	179	(6)
My mother is no longer stable on her feet, but she insists on climbing on chairs to reach her cabinets	185	(7)
My mother moved in with us, and it's not working	192	(8)
My sister is stealing from our mother	200	(7)
My mother's handyman borrows money from her and doesn't pay her back	207	(5)
My father's frequent phone calls are just too much	212	(6)
Notes for My Own Situation	218	(2)
Resources	220	(4)
Index	224