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9780738203171

Divorced Dad's Survival Book How To Stay Connected With Your Kids

by ;
  • ISBN13:

    9780738203171

  • ISBN10:

    0738203173

  • Format: Paperback
  • Copyright: 2000-08-18
  • Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
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Summary

The Divorced Dad's Survival Book: How to Stay Connected with Your Kids shows how to navigate the process of getting a divorce so as to minimize the negative impact on one's children. The goal of the book is to show how fathers can use the divorce to improve their relationship with their kids. David Knox, a divorced father of two, presents a book designed to show fathers how to replace the fear of losing their children with insightful knowledge of what the children may be experiencing during the divorce and offers specific suggestions on maintaining and improving relations with them. The father-child relationship cannot only survive but also triumph over divorce through conscious and deliberate planning and execution.

Author Biography

A marriage and family therapist and Professor of Sociology at East Carolina University, Dr. David Knox is also the author or co-author of ten books including Choices in Relationships and How to Be Your Own Family Therapist. He lives with his second wife and stepdaughter in North Carolina.

Table of Contents

Foreword xi
Preface xiii
Introduction and Overview 1(8)
Act Now
9(16)
Real Men Have Feelings, Too
10
The Road Ahead: Stages of a Divorced Father's Life
2(15)
Roadblocks to the Divorced Father's Relationship with His Children
17(3)
Perseverance Will Pay Off
20(1)
Action You Should Take Now
21(4)
Understand Your Children's Perspective
25(16)
Breaking the News
26(1)
Feelings Children Typically Have about Their Parents' Divorce
27(4)
Things You Can't Change
31(3)
Things You Can Do to Help
34(5)
Conclusion
39(2)
Be Your Own Cognitive Therapist
41(12)
Taking Control of Your Perspective
43(4)
Dealing with Social Contexts
47(1)
Focus on the Advantages
48(2)
Let Go of Past Mistakes
50(1)
Conclusion
51(2)
What to Do and Not Do when Your Children Are with You
53(22)
Handling Visitation
57(6)
What to Do when Your Children Are with You
63(2)
What to Do when Your Child Asks
65(3)
What Not to Do when Your Children Are with You
68(5)
Conclusion
73(2)
What to Do and Not Do When Your Children Are with Their Mother
75(12)
Refocus when Children Are Away
76(1)
What to Do when Your Children Are with Their Mother
77(5)
What Not to Do when Your Children Are with Their Mother
82(3)
Conclusion
85(2)
How to Interact with Your Former Spouse
87(14)
Your Former Wife's Reaction to the Divorce
87(4)
Relationships with Former Wives
91(4)
Take the High Ground when Possible
95(1)
Communicating with Your Former Wife
96(2)
When Your Former Spouse Abandons the Children
98(1)
Postdivorce Prevention Programs for Divorced Spouses
99(1)
Conclusion
100(1)
Attempt to Mediate Your Differences with Your Former Wife
101(18)
Divorce Mediation
101(2)
Benefits of Divorce Mediation
103(4)
When Divorce Mediation Will Not Work
107(2)
Issues of Divorce Mediation
109(3)
Rules Divorce Mediators Play By
112(2)
Example of an Agreement Couples Sign before Mediation Begins
114(1)
Example of a Mediated Agreement
115(1)
Conclusion
116(3)
Settle Your Differences in Court if You Must
119(20)
Legal Hardball Dos and Don'ts
119(7)
How Much Legal Access to Your Children Do You Want?
126(3)
If You Want Primary Physical Custody
129(2)
If You Want Joint Custody
131(7)
Conclusion
138(1)
Give Your Children Time to Accept Your New Partner
139(8)
When You Fall in Love with a New Partner but Your Children Don't
140(4)
Issues to Consider in the Meantime
144(1)
It Happens: The Ex Says, ``The Children Can't Visit if She's There''
145(1)
Conclusion
146(1)
For the New Partner---by the New Partner
147(22)
Know What You're Getting Into
148(4)
Being a Supportive Partner
152(7)
Building a Relationship with His Children
159(7)
Dos
166(1)
Don'ts
166(1)
Hope Ahead
167(2)
Gay Dads
169(14)
Who Are Gay Fathers?
169(1)
How Many Gay Dads Are There?
170(1)
Coming Out to the Wife
171(1)
Coming Out to the Children
172(5)
Custody and Visitation Issues for Gay Dads
177(4)
Conclusion
181(2)
Remarriage---for You and Your Children's Mother
183(14)
When You Remarry
183(2)
Before You Remarry
185(3)
Children's Views on Remarriage
188(4)
The Remarriage of Your Former Spouse
192(1)
Stages toward Feeling Like a Family Again
193(2)
Conclusion
195(2)
The Importance of Staying Connected with Your Children
197(16)
The Devaluation of Fathers
197(2)
How Having a Father Is Beneficial to Children
199(6)
How Fathering and Mothering Differ
205(4)
The Need for New Social Policies
209(4)
Some Tips on Fathering
213(14)
A Profile of Divorced Fathers
213(3)
Four Facts about Fatherhood
216(1)
Four Different Parenting Styles
217(1)
Eight Needs of Children
218(4)
Guidelines to Improving Your Child's Behavior
222(3)
When Dads Must Find Day Care
225(2)
Conclusion: The Choice of Every Dad 227(2)
Endnotes 229(10)
Appendix I. Legal Terms 239(2)
Appendix II. Legal Specification of Visitation Rights 241(4)
Appendix III. An Open Letter to Judges 245(2)
Appendix IV. National and International Listing of Attorneys, Mediators, and Custody Evaluators 247(96)
Appendix V. Resources and Websites 343(4)
Index 347

Supplemental Materials

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The New copy of this book will include any supplemental materials advertised. Please check the title of the book to determine if it should include any access cards, study guides, lab manuals, CDs, etc.

The Used, Rental and eBook copies of this book are not guaranteed to include any supplemental materials. Typically, only the book itself is included. This is true even if the title states it includes any access cards, study guides, lab manuals, CDs, etc.

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