1001 Funniest Things Ever Said

by Edited and with an Introduction by Steven D. Price

• ISBN13: 9781592284436
• ISBN10: 1592284434
• Format: Trade Book
• Copyright: 2006-11-01
• Publisher: Lyons Press

Summary

Here are a thousand and one laugh-out-loud quotes, quips and jokes, all in one packed volume. From politicians to sports legends, Hollywood stars to Miss USA contestants, comedians are not the only ones tickling our funny bones and showing us the lighter side of life. For example: Playwright George S. Kaufman said to fellow Algonquin Round Table wit, Marc Connolly, "I like your bald head, Marc, It feels just like my wife's behind." Connolly replied, feeling his pate, "So it does, George!" "Football combines two of the worst things in American life. It is violence punctuated by committee meetings." -George Will "Whenever I'm asked what kind of writing is most lucrative, I have to say ransom notes." -H. N. Swanson Whether it's the perfectly timed response to an insult, or an on-the-spot play on words, 1001 Funniest Things Ever Said is sure to draw a smile from even the most solemn reader.

Author Biography

Steven D. Price, a consulting editor of the Lyons Press, is the author of twenty-five books, among them the riotously funny companion volume, 1001 Dumbest Things Ever Said. He lives in New York City.

Table of Contents

Introduction	vii
The Funny Men and Women: ``Take My Wife . . . Please!''	1	(60)
Sports Capers: Casey Stengel Would Be Spinning in His Grave	61	(56)
Show Biz Antics: Give the Public What They Want	117	(32)
Political Badinage: Catapault the Propaganda	149	(44)
Literary Lampoons: You Can Make Up Almost Anything	193	(20)
Classic Jests: An All-Star Team of All-Time Favorites	213	(24)
Musical Drolleries: Better Than It Sounds	237	(16)
Quips Heard Around the World: A Palm Tree in Dakota	253	(12)
Ethnic Jokes: ``Iceberg, Goldberg---What's the Difference?''	265	(18)
Wordplay: Beyond My Apprehension	283	(32)
Kid Stuff: Knock, Knock, Yo' Mama	315	(20)
Index	335