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"You were practicallywavingthe note at Mrs. Hobson!" Nicole said as they headed out for recess. "No wonder you got caught!"
"No, I wasn't!" Keely protested. "It was on my lap!"
But had she lifted it up, trying to figure out what Stef was trying to tell her? Tears stung in her eyes, and she angrily blinked them away. She had to be ready. Stef was bound to lecture her again.
But Stef turned around and told Nicole, "Shh. Don't talk about it now. Not until we're..." She tilted her head in a signal they all understood. They were going out to the tree to talk.
The tree wastheirspot. It was at the very edge of the playground, past the swings, past the jungle gym, past the baby slides the kindergartners used. It was so far out that sometimes at the beginning of the year the teacher with playground duty had yelled at them, "Hey, where are the four of you going?"
Stef had always gone back to explain. Stef knew how to talk to teachers.
Now they could walk out to the tree and nobody said anything. And nobody followed.
The ground was frozen beneath Keely's feet, but the sun was out and the air was warm. It didn't feel like January. Keely didn't even need her mittens. If Keely hadn't been so stupid as to get caught with that note, she could be enjoying the winter sunshine right now, enjoying being back with her friends, enjoying recess.
They reached the tree. Keely leaned against the bark, letting the tree hold her up.
"Listen," Stef said, lowering her voice even though they were a long, long way from any of the other kids. "Forget about Keely's mistake. Do any of you knowwhyAnya's wearing a wig?"
Keely breathed out a silent sigh of relief. She waited for Nicole or Tory to answer. That was how their friendship went. Stef was in charge. She was the one who had decided when they had all gotten too old for dolls. She was the one who had decided soccer wasn't really very much fun after all. She was the one who had decided glitter gel was stupid. She was the one who usually decided what they were going to play every day at recess.
Nicole and Tory were next in line. Sometimes Nicole or Tory could even tell Stef what to do. Just not very often.
And then there was Keely. Sometimes she felt like she was just hanging on by her fingertips. Sometimes it seemed like she was just one mistake away from not having any friends. That's why she tried to keep her mouth shut, whenever possible.
She didn't want to be like Anya. Did Anya ever have anyone to play with?
Nicole shook her blond hair so it bounced against her shoulders. "Maybe Anya thinks she's going to start a new fashion or something," she giggled.
Tory ran her hand through her dark hair. "Well, it's not going to catch on. I'd hate wearing a wig," she said.
Keely noticed that no one waited for her to answer.
"No, no, guys, think," Stef said impatiently. "What if shehasto wear a wig? Because her own hair is falling out?"
"Eeww," Nicole said, turning up her nose.
"No, listen. What if she has cancer? And her hair's falling out because she has to have chemotherapy?"
Nobody said anything. The tree's empty branches rattled overhead.
Cancer?Keely thought.Cancer?She felt like her heart skipped a beat.
"But Anya's just a kid. Like us," Tory said.
"Yeah," Stef whispered. "And she might be dying."
Keely had a sudden memory of kindergarten. The first day, Anya had held the door of the classroom open for Keely to go in in front of her. Keely could remember what Anya had been wearing that day: a frilly pink dress. And Anya's mom or somebody had curled Anya's hair and pulled it back in a big pink bow. Keely had watched those bobbing curls and felt her own fear fade away. Someone was being nice to her already. Maybe school wouldn't be so bad after all.
And now Anya, the first person to be nice to Keely at school, was going to die?
"Somebody would have told us," Nicole said. "Mrs. Hobson or...or Mrs. Wiley."
Mrs. Wiley was the guidance counselor. She came into their classroom every month or so and talked about feelings and friendship and having good self-esteem. Stef, Nicole, and Tory always laughed at Mrs. Wiley, but Keely wanted every word she spoke to be true.
"Maybe Anya didn't want anyone to know," Stef said. "Maybe she's being brave and strong, and doesn't want anyone to feel sorry for her. We ought to do something to help her."
Stef got like this sometimes. Just when Keely had decided Stef was the meanest person she knew, Stef would turn everything around and act like the kindest person ever. Keely could tell that Nicole was feeling bad now for making a face and saying "Eeww" about Anya's hair maybe falling out. Keely herself felt bad for thinking Stef had passed her the note about Anya's wig so Keely would laugh at her.
"What do you think we should do?" Keely asked in a small voice.
"I don't know..." Stef let her voice trail off. She stared off into the distance, watching the other kids on the playground. "There's got to be something we can do to cheer up Anya."
"My mom read this thing in the newspaper," Tory said. "There was this high school football player, see? And he got cancer and had to have whatever that stuff's called -- "
"Chemotherapy," Stef said.
"Yeah, that. Anyway, he lost all his hair. And to show how much they cared about him, all the other boys on the football team shaved their heads too. So he wouldn't stand out, because they were all bald."
For one horrible second Keely thought Stef was going to say that was what they'd have to do for Anya. No matter how bad she felt for Anya, Keely didn't want to be bald.
Then she saw Stef's hand fly up to her hair, and Keely knew: Stef would never say they should shave their heads.
Keely had never thought about it much before, but all her friends had really great hair. Tory's was dark and sleek and shiny -- it reminded Keely of the seals she'd seen at the zoo, flashing through the water. Nicole's was long and blond, and didn't everyone always want to be blond?
But Stef's was the most impressive of all. It was red and wavy, and stood out like a great cloud around her head. People always noticed Stef, because they noticed her hair.
"Anya would probably just think we were making fun of her if we cut off all our hair," Stef said, like that was the only reason she didn't want to shave her head. "Besides, we don't know that she's bald, just that she's wearing a wig. No, we'll just have to go out of our way to be nice to her. That's what we'll do."
As if Stef had planned it, the recess bell rang just then. All four girls took off running, back to the school. Keely felt her long hair thumping against her shoulders as she ran.
I'm glad I have hair,she thought.I'm glad I don't have to wear a wig.
I'm glad I don't have cancer.
Copyright © 2002 by Margaret Peterson Haddix
Excerpted from Because of Anya by Margaret Peterson Haddix All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.
