Caramba!

by MARTINEZ, NINA MARIE

• ISBN13: 9781400077380
• ISBN10: 1400077389
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2006-08-08
• Publisher: Vintage Espanol

Summary

Welcome to Lava Landing, population 27,454, a town just this side of Mexico, where Miss Magma reigns and rockabilly and mariachi music are king. Enter our protagonists, Natalie and Consuelo, self-described "like-minded individuals." They spend their days at The Big Cheese Plant and their nights at The Big Five-Four, the hottest spot in town. But they have long-term projects, foremost among them to cure Consuelo of her unreasonable fear of public transportation and long car rides so they can finally take Natalie's 1963 Cadillac convertible on the road trip it deserves . . . From the Hardcover edition.

Author Biography

Nina Marie Martínez was born in San José, California to a first generation Mexican-American father, and an American mother of Germanic descent. A high school dropout, she holds a Bachelors degree in literature from the University of California at Santa Cruz. In addition to writing novels, she is also a vintage clothes enthusiast and dealer and an avid baseball fan. She currently resides in Northern California where she is at work on her second novel.


From the Hardcover edition.

Table of Contents

Tabla 1 UNA PRESENTACION DE LOS JUGADORES
Personas de ideas afines	3	(5)
El dilema de Consuelo	8	(4)
Tener mejores cosas que hacer	12	(3)
El Gran Cinco-Cuatro	15	(3)
Diagrama: Guia a la Rocola de El Gran Cinco-Cuatro	18	(3)
El mariachi	21	(7)
Las serenatas	28	(6)
El dilema de Lucha	34	(6)
El ocio de Lulabel	40	(7)
La epoca de la elegancia	47	(4)
Donde la lava aterrizo	51	(3)
Diagrama: Cronologia del volcan	54	(3)
Lucha sale de la carcel	57	(4)
Artefacto: Orden de libertad condicional de Lucha	61	(2)
La Gran Fabrica de Quesos	63	(6)
Artefacto: Muneca de papel con un traje regional de Lulabel	69	(1)
Diagrama: El ajolote	70	(3)
Tabla 2 SE BARAJAN LAS CARTAS
Neotenia versus metamorfosis	73	(6)
El sueno de Consuelo: Un relato en tiempo presente	79	(3)
El mejor postor	82	(5)
Artefacto: Un anuncio clasificado	87	(1)
El sueno de Nataly	88	(5)
La pura neta	93	(7)
Las serenatas II	100	(4)
La fiesta del Tupper	104	(6)
El vivo deseo de Lulabel	110	(4)
Mapa: Guia de Mexico de Lulabel	114	(3)
El mero mero quesero	117	(5)
El mago de Michoacan	122	(2)
Haciendo ``bisnes''	124	(7)
Un buen susto	131	(6)
Una yarda o articulos de mayor interes que Naty y Chelo tuvieron que vender para financiar el viaje de Nataly al sur para que esta intentara por todos los medios de extraer del purgatorio el alma descarriada de don Pancho	137	(4)
Tabla 3 SE CORTA LA BARAJA
Platica entre mujeres	141	(3)
Mapa: La trayectoria de Nataly	144	(2)
La Catrina	146	(5)
El dia en que Lulabel remato su alma	151	(6)
Don Pancho se escapa del purgatorio	157	(6)
El otro lado del hechizo	163	(4)
El primer milagro de don Pancho	167	(8)
El plan	175	(5)
Artefacto: La lista del mandado de Lulabel	180	(2)
El dilema de Nataly	182	(5)
La larga distancia	187	(10)
Tabla 4 LOS JUGADORES HACEN SUS APUESTAS
La pura neta	197	(1)
Artefacto: La carta de True-Dee a Querida Claudia	198	(6)
La feria	204	(8)
Manana	212	(5)
Platica entre mujeres II	217	(7)
Cena anual para peones de rancho y jornaleros ofrecida por Lulabel	224	(10)
No lo puedo believe	234	(3)
Artefactos: La carta en La Guia para True-Dee, La contestacion personal de Querida Claudia para True-Dee, y copia de la columna de Querida Claudia en cuanto a su contestacion a True-Dee	237	(4)
Cierta tristeza	241	(5)
A medio camino	246	(6)
Un tipo medio raro	252	(9)
Tabla 5 SE REPARTEN LAS CARTAS
Aquella platica	261	(3)
El Gran Cinco-Cuatro	264	(4)
Artefacto: Mas munecas de papel con los trajes regionales de Lulabel	268	(2)
Los dieciseis anillos de oro de Lulabel	270	(4)
Artefacto: La lista de los pros y los contras acerca de la Lulabel	274	(2)
El desayuno de los campeones	276	(4)
Querida Claudia	280	(5)
Por obra del Senor	285	(10)
Los botes	295	(4)
El reencuentro	299	(7)
Problemas en el paraiso, y como estos ayudaron a que Lulabel se convirtiera en una mujer decente	306	(4)
Personalidad	310	(5)
El baile grande: Un relato en tiempo presente	315	(8)
Artefacto: Otra muneca de papel con un traje regional de Lulabel	323	(1)
El asiento del conductor	324	(11)
Tabla 6 LOS JUGADORES SE SIENTAN EN UN CIRCULO FRENTE A FRENTE MIENTRAS EL UNIVERSO SUSURRA: ``VAS A TENER QUE PAGAR PARA VER MIS CARTAS''
La ultima pieza	335	(5)
La recta final: El sueno de Javier	340	(2)
Tan pronto como sea posible	342	(6)
Artefacto: La nota de Javier a Lucha	348	(1)
El mero mero quesero II	349	(5)
Artefacto: El obituario de Cal McDaniel	354	(1)
Artefacto: Ultima voluntad y testamento de Cal Leroy McDaniel	355	(6)
Ajustando cuentas, o que diferencia hace un solo dia, o como Javier paso su ultimo dia en Lavalandia antes de dirigirse a la Sierra Madre no solo en busca de oro, sino de si mismo: Un relato en tiempo presente	361	(8)
Donde la lava aterrizo II	369	(13)
Artefacto: Articulo del periodico: ``¡Que tembleque!''	382

Excerpts

Chapter 1 Tabla 1 An Introduction to the Players LIKE-MINDED INDIVIDUALS Natalie and Consuelo were best friends since the second grade when the latter stuck a piece of ABC gum in the former's hair while they were engaged in a fistfight over a boy whose name neither of them could remember. When Natalie had to cut her then waist-length hair up to a chin-length bob, Consuelo followed suit. Both girls realized at the early age of eight, a man is the last thing that ought to come between friends. On a Saturday night Consuelo called Natalie, not for any of the usual reasons, but to inform her that she had just killed a man. This scared Natalie even more than the time she was shoe-jacked by a mental ward escapee who made off with her favorite pair of black platform slides. Consuelo forwent the details, but implored Natalie to "come quick." Natalie ran to her closet and pulled out her favorite dress, which was long and black with spaghetti straps, and her favorite sweater: a pink mohair cardigan with pearly buttons. She threw on a strand of faux pearls she had bought after watching Breakfast at Tiffany's on late-night TV-trouble she normally wouldn't have gone to, but it was a Saturday night, and if it really was true, if Consuelo really had committed the crime she had spoken of over the telephone, then it was all the more reason why the girls ought to have a good time while they still could. On the way to Consuelo's, Natalie considered herself lucky to have eight cylinders on her side. She had worked every summer between the second and ninth grades either picking or cutting apricots, and sometimes both, in order to earn enough money to buy the car of her dreams: a 1963 convertible Cadillac El Dorado. As she pulled into Roscoe's to fill up, she was struck by a sense of pride and sentimentality. In that day and age as well as any other, a girl needed all the advantages she could get, and Natalie was happy to have a car that was on the one hand beautiful and elegant, and on the other, responsive and powerful-characteristics she strived for in herself. With that sentiment in mind, she eased into the full-service island and said to the attendant, "I'll take a tankful of Super Unleaded, and be sure to top it off, please." Common sense and the movies told her that when two girls go on the lam, a full tank of gas is an essential starting point. The dust followed Natalie down the back roads while Eydie Gorme y Los Panchos hummed "Mala Noche" from the AM radio. When Natalie arrived, she was surprised to see Consuelo sitting on the wooden steps which led to her front porch, idly smoking a cigarette. Consuelo did not appear the least bit vexed, her composure failed to resemble that of a murderer or even a man slaughterer. With her long black hair parted down the middle and sectioned into two neat ponytails, she wore a white tank top and a pair of red terry cloth shorts. As Natalie approached Consuelo, she looked into her eyes and tried to find the dancing devils Consuelo's mother insisted dwelt within, but all she saw were two mossy puddles. Consuelo claimed her mother was crazy, a point Natalie wouldn't argue against, but the fact is, most Mexicans don't get green eyes, so when one does, it's a big deal. Natalie remembered something Consuelo once told her. When Consuelo was four years old, she met her tia Concha for the first and only time. Taking the child's chin in her hand, Concha looked into Consuelo's eyes saying, "You only get one life, chica. Live it up." With those words, claimed Consuelo, it was as if Concha had planted a seed within her, then, momentarily opening her up, she had shed sunlight and rainwater upon it, causing it to grow and grow, wrapping its vines around her innards, seeking its escape. Consuelo considered this her most formative moment. She would always remember her tia with a strange mixtu