The Church Case Scenario: How to Survive and Thrive in Church

by Bickel, Bruce; Jantz, Stan

• ISBN13: 9781586605773
• ISBN10: 1586605771
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2002-07-01
• Publisher: Barbour Pub Inc

Summary

The bad news: Statics tell us that half of all people who go to church while growing up leave the church once they become adults. But there is good news: Bruce and Stan, who grew up in the church and survived, recommend the church experience to anyone adventurous enough to give it a shot. They're so positive about the church that they've written this book to show people how to do what they've done: Survive and thrive in the church. Drawing upon nostalgic memories and positive experiences, these two veteran churchgoers make a case for appreciating rather than avoiding it. Bruce and Stan had only two rules to guide them: First, don't take yourself too seriously. Second, take God very seriously. It all adds up to an encouraging and often funny look at the world's greatest institution (and they mean that in a good way).

Table of Contents

Introduction	9	(4)
The Church Service
How to Determine What You Should Wear to Church	13	(5)
How to Decipher a Church Bulletin	18	(4)
How to Handle the Offering Plate	22	(5)
How to Know When to Stand Up and When to Sit Down	27	(4)
How to Stay Awake During a Boring Sermon	31	(4)
How to Interpret Church Terminology	35	(9)
How to Know When You Are Ready to Join a Church	44	(2)
How to Really Worship God	46	(2)
Church People
How to Tell the Difference Between a Deacon and a Trustee	48	(5)
How to Deal with Someone Who Sits in Your Pew	53	(4)
How to Handle a Hypocrite	57	(5)
How to Respond When Church Gossip Hits Home	62	(3)
How to Support a Missionary Family	65	(4)
How to Love Everybody in Church	69	(2)
How to Get Elected to the Church Board	71	(5)
How to Break Up a Fight in a Church Board Meeting	76	(4)
How to Join the Church Choir (When You Don't Know How to Sing)	80	(4)
How to Know When You're Read to Sin a Solo	84	(5)
How a Church Finds a Pastor	89	(7)
How to Make Sense Out of Your Church Finances	96	(5)
How to Encourage Your Leaders	101	(2)
Church School
How to Memorize Bible Verses	103	(4)
How to Get a Perfect Attendance Pin	107	(3)
How to Tell the Difference Between Catechism, Confirmation, Communion, and Confession	110	(4)
How to Make a Replica of the Sistine Chapel (Using Only Pipe Cleaners and a Lanyard)	114	(3)
How to Make a Shepherd's Costume Out of a Bathrobe	117	(4)
How to Properly Videotape the Christmas Program	121	(4)
How to Work in the Nursery (Without Losing Your Mind)	125	(5)
How to Grow a Kid	130	(2)
Church Youth Groups
How to Survive Junior High Church	132	(4)
How to Be Cool in High School	136	(5)
How to Put on a Successful Youth Banquet	141	(4)
How to Audition for a Church Youth Band	145	(5)
How to Properly Maintain the Church Bus	150	(4)
How to Invite a Friend to Church	154	(3)
How to Live a Double Life	157	(4)
How to Get a Teenager to Love Church	161	(2)
Church Picnics, Potlucks, and Retreats
How to Get Red Punch Stains Out of the Church Fellowship Hall Carpet	163	(3)
How to Make an Edible Covered-Dish Casserole	166	(4)
How to Win a Church Softball Game	170	(4)
How to Enjoy a Couples' Retreat	174	(4)
How to Tell the Difference Between a Men's and Women's Conference	178	(5)
How to Avoid the Church Fund-Raiser	183	(3)
How to Let People Know Church Is a Good Thing	186	(3)
Afterword	189	(2)
About the Authors	191