Complete Idiot's Guide to Understanding Men & Women

by Glass, Lillian J.

• ISBN13: 9780028624143
• ISBN10: 0028624149
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2001-01-09
• Publisher: DK Publishing, Inc.
• More Book Details
• Purchase Benefits

Summary

Why is it that some women expect men to "just know" what they want? Or, why is it that some men find it difficult to express their feelings, leaving the females in their lives confused? Here's the book that helps readers communicate their feelings and finally understand what the men and women in their personal lives, as well as in the workplace, are thinking and why they act the way they do. This fascinating book discusses the differences in the way the opposite sex communicates including body language and conversational styles and shows readers how they can overcome communication barriers and improve their relationships. Couples learn how to become sensitive to each other's emotions and figure out if their mate is "in the mood," having a bad day, and more.

Author Biography

Dr. Lillian Glass holds a Ph.D.s. in counseling psychology and communication disorders, and is the author of The Complete Idiot's Guide® to Verbal Self-Defense. For five years, she was the psychology reporter at KABC, Los Angeles, and she has been featured on The Rikki Lake Show, Geraldo, and The Larry King Show.

Table of Contents

Sorting Out Our Differences	p. 1
Finding Common Ground in Gender Differences	p. 3
Resistance to Difference	p. 4
Knowledge Is Power	p. 5
Nature Versus Nurture: Part I	p. 6
The Math Equation	p. 6
The Language of Gender	p. 7
The Benefits of Better Understanding	p. 8
Lesson #1: Listen, Listen, Listen	p. 9
What Do We Really Know About One Another?	p. 13
How Much Do You Assume: Dr. Glass' Sex Talk Quiz	p. 14
The Truth About "Intuition"	p. 16
The Truth About Talk	p. 16
Men Are the Talkers	p. 17
Fast-Talking Women	p. 17
And What's Important to You?	p. 17
The Friendlier Gender	p. 18
Praising Women	p. 18
Ahem: Men Interruptus!	p. 18
Demanding Men and Tentative Women	p. 19
Different Strokes for Different Genders	p. 20
Where's That Funny Bone?	p. 20
Talking in the Dark	p. 20
Men Don't Ask for Help!	p. 21
It's Tough Being a Girl	p. 21
Undermining Self-Talk	p. 21
Straighten Up and Fly Right!	p. 22
Attention to Detail: A Woman's Prerogative	p. 22
Gender Communication: Touch Versus Eye Contact	p. 22
Emotional Equality	p. 23
Women Get Personal!	p. 23
Women Bring Up the Topics!	p. 23
Communication Family Style	p. 24
Confronting Problems	p. 24
Communication Breakdown, Gender Style	p. 27
The Body Language of Dominance	p. 28
Body Space	p. 29
Hand Me This!	p. 30
Face It!	p. 30
Male Versus Female Conversational Tones	p. 32
How We Act	p. 33
The Power Is Yours	p. 35
Understanding the Great Nature/Nurture Debate	p. 37
The Role of Mother Nature	p. 39
The Human Brain: Male and Female	p. 40
The World of the Brain	p. 40
Gender Pathways	p. 40
XX and XY: Genetics 101	p. 41
The Role of Hormones	p. 42
There's Only One Brain!	p. 43
Male Brain Development	p. 43
Female Brain Development	p. 44
Baby Doll Versus Keep on Truckin'	p. 45
The Role of Mother Nurture	p. 47
Cultural Sex-Pectations	p. 48
Boys Will Be Boys	p. 49
The Crimes of Nursery Rhymes	p. 50
Little Miss Muffet, Get Off Your Tuffet	p. 50
Bif! Boom! Bad Cartoons!	p. 52
Bedtime Brainwashing	p. 52
Toys Are Not Us!	p. 53
She's Pretty as a Picture!	p. 53
Talkin' Just Like Her Mom	p. 54
Improving Gender Role Models	p. 54
Nature Meets Nurture	p. 57
The Root of the Problem	p. 57
Aggression in Boys	p. 58
Directions, Please!	p. 60
Details, Details, Details	p. 60
The Gender of Professions	p. 61
The Voice of Gender	p. 62
Reading Between the Lines!	p. 62
Nods of Approval	p. 63
"Mr. and Ms. Understanding"	p. 65
Learning the Language of Gender	p. 67
Socialization: Male and Female	p. 68
Boy Style	p. 70
The Gross-Out	p. 71
The Thrill of the Curse Word	p. 72
The Female Side of the Equation	p. 73
Talk, Talk, Talk	p. 73
Spilling the Beans	p. 74
Keeping Secrets	p. 74
The Teen Years	p. 75
Inter-Gender Speak	p. 75
Boys and Compliments	p. 76
Making New Friends	p. 76
Mirror, Mirror on the Wall	p. 77
Blue Versus Pink	p. 79
Gaining Emotional Equality	p. 80
Tapping into Your Feelings	p. 81
Stop the Blame Game	p. 82
Resist the Instinct to Help!	p. 83
Her Need for Your Approval	p. 84
Don't Fix Her Up	p. 84
The Power of a Compliment	p. 84
Forgive and Forget?	p. 85
The Long, Long Female Memory	p. 86
Cease Control	p. 87
The Need for Closeness	p. 88
It's Not About Nagging	p. 89
R-E-S-P-E-C-T	p. 89
Pink Versus Blue	p. 91
He Isn't (Necessarily) a Jerk!	p. 91
Accept His Need to Boast	p. 92
Humor Him	p. 92
Taking Up Space	p. 93
Resist the Desire to Nurture!	p. 94
Another Word for Control Is ...?	p. 95
"I Want to Do It Myself!"	p. 95
Bridging the Gap	p. 96
I Just Want to Be Loved	p. 97
Don't Fight Him, Join Him!	p. 97
The Space Race	p. 97
Actions Speak Louder	p. 99
Learning the Basics of Good Communication with the Opposite Sex	p. 101
Change Is Good	p. 102
Why Should I Change?	p. 102
Finding Common Ground	p. 102
Mix and Match Interests	p. 104
Don't Hog the Dialogue	p. 104
Look and Listen and Stop Missin'	p. 105
Speak Up! Be Heard	p. 106
Battleground of the Sexes	p. 109
Basic Madness: Unmanaged Anger	p. 111
Is Your Relationship Toxic?	p. 112
Bursting Out of the Cage	p. 113
Words That Hurt Never Heal	p. 114
The Source of the Toxins	p. 116
That Old Green-Eyed Monster	p. 116
Unconstructive Criticism	p. 118
The Groucho Marx Syndrome	p. 118
Understanding Toxic Relationships	p. 119
Healing Toxic Relationships	p. 119
Mad About Women	p. 121
What's Wrong? Nothing! No, Something!	p. 122
Accuse Me!	p. 123
What Are You, My Keeper?	p. 124
The Caveman Cometh	p. 126
Keep the Change!	p. 127
No Competition Allowed Here!	p. 127
Get to the Point Already!	p. 129
Tell Me You Didn't Say That!	p. 129
Treading on Sacred Ground	p. 130
He Just Told You He Loved You!	p. 130
Mad About Men	p. 133
Is That It? N-I-C-E?	p. 133
Feelings Are a Girl's Best Friend	p. 134
Listen and Enjoy	p. 135
Be a Man of Your Word	p. 136
Grow Accustomed to Her Face	p. 137
Empathize, Don't Solve!	p. 138
No Orders in This Drill!	p. 138
Stop with the Jokes Already!	p. 139
The Art of the Turn-On	p. 141
Playing (and Winning) the Dating Game	p. 143
Compassion Leads to Passion	p. 144
Finding a Match Made in Heaven	p. 145
In the Eye of the Beholder	p. 146
Men and Their Icons	p. 146
Women: More Forgiving	p. 147
Accent the Positive: Strategies of Attraction	p. 148
The Sound of Music	p. 148
Confident and Sexy!	p. 148
Smiling Faces Go Places	p. 149
Warmth Is the Key	p. 149
That Very Important Next Step	p. 150
The Truth Will Out	p. 150
Be Interested, Not Interesting	p. 151
Flags and Warnings	p. 151
Be a Friend First	p. 152
Attracting the Opposite Sex	p. 153
Who's Type Are You, Anyway?	p. 153
What Attracts You the Most?	p. 155
Confidence: The Key to Sexual Attractiveness	p. 156
Getting Some Confidence and Charisma	p. 157
The Touch of Attraction	p. 158
Shake It Up, Baby!	p. 158
That First Touch	p. 158
Translating Body Language	p. 159
Intimate Misunderstandings	p. 161
Sexy Differences	p. 162
Styles of Affection	p. 162
Cuddling Women	p. 162
Teasing Leads to Hurt Feelings	p. 163
Kissing and Making Up	p. 163
Speak Up and Speak Out	p. 164
No Mind Reading Allowed!	p. 165
The Intimacy Questionnaire	p. 165
Learning the Right Touch	p. 167
Not Tonight, Dear	p. 168
Top Secrets About Men	p. 171
Men Are Not (Necessarily) "Commitaphobic"	p. 171
Men Fear Rejection	p. 172
Men Want to Be the Biggest and the Best	p. 173
Men Like to Avoid Confrontation	p. 173
Men Hate to Be Criticized	p. 174
All Men Are Repairmen	p. 174
Men Like Women with Verve!	p. 175
Men Prefer the "Natural Look"	p. 175
Men Hate Being Changed	p. 175
Men Like to Be Gross and Irreverent	p. 176
Men Lie for Good Reasons, Too	p. 176
Men Don't Want to Be Put on the Spot	p. 177
Men Have a Push-and-Pull Syndrome	p. 178
Men Avoid Toxic Women	p. 178
Top Secrets About Women	p. 181
Women Think Nonlinearly	p. 181
Women Change Their Minds Easily	p. 182
Women Appreciate Men Who Cry	p. 183
Women Love to Shop	p. 183
Women Feel Guilt About Anger	p. 184
Women Need Constant Reassurance	p. 185
Women Are Really Little Girls	p. 185
Women Are Ambitious	p. 186
Women Start the Arguments	p. 186
Women Take Flirtation Seriously	p. 187
Women Are Better Drivers	p. 188
Women Have Better Memories	p. 188
Peaceful Co-Existence	p. 191
What Men Want and Don't Want from Women	p. 193
Looks Count	p. 193
Men Want to Be King	p. 194
Men Want Praise	p. 194
Men Want to Shine	p. 194
A Lady at Table, a Mistress in Bed	p. 195
Eat, Eat, Eat!	p. 195
No Punishment, Please	p. 196
Get to the Point	p. 197
Leave Feelings Aside	p. 197
Lighten Up	p. 197
Leave Him Be	p. 198
Time Out	p. 198
Okay Anger	p. 199
Blending In	p. 199
The Trust Quotient	p. 200
Silence Is Golden	p. 201
Confidence Is Key	p. 202
Hold Back on the Doting	p. 203
Change Him Not!	p. 204
What Women Want and Don't Want from Men	p. 207
Be a Gentleman	p. 207
Stop Kidding Around	p. 208
Help Them Eat Less	p. 209
Treat Them Like Queens	p. 209
Women Expect Presents	p. 210
Understanding Biological Time	p. 212
Romance Is Queen	p. 213
Friends, Just Friends	p. 214
Commit, Commit, Commit	p. 214
Widening the Circle	p. 215
Feeling Sexy	p. 216
TLC for PMS	p. 216
Help Out!	p. 216
Courtesy, Please	p. 217
Men at Work	p. 219
Avoiding Sexual Harassment Suits	p. 219
Falling Down the Corporate Ladder	p. 220
Sexual Harassment: A Quiz	p. 221
Bringing Home the Bacon	p. 222
Lose the Attitude	p. 222
Politeness Is Potent!	p. 223
Men and the Woman Boss	p. 224
Office Flirts Hurt	p. 225
Keep Your Hands to Yourself	p. 225
Stop with the Jokes Already!	p. 226
Let Her Speak!	p. 226
Making Eye Contact	p. 227
The Art of Constructive Criticism	p. 228
Women at Work	p. 231
The Bottom Line: Money Matters	p. 231
Monkey See, Monkey Do!	p. 232
She's Not the "B" Word!	p. 232
Bringing in Something Unique	p. 234
Breaking Through the Glass Ceiling	p. 234
She's Not One of the Guys	p. 235
Keep Your Personal Life Close and Personal	p. 236
You Don't Have to Answer	p. 237
Hold No Grudges	p. 238
No Crying Games	p. 239
Speak Up!	p. 239
Where's the Mouse?	p. 239
Spit It Out Already!	p. 240
De-Personalizing Rejection	p. 240
Seeking Similarities	p. 243
We All Carry Baggage	p. 243
We All Want to Feel Like Number One	p. 244
No One Likes Secrets Revealed	p. 244
Nobody Likes a Gold Digger	p. 245
Love Us Just the Way We Are	p. 246
What You See Is What You Get!	p. 247
Slow Down!	p. 248
We're All Afraid of Commitment	p. 248
We All Want That Pedestal	p. 249
We All Hate Personal Competition	p. 249
Equal Aggression	p. 250
Green with Jealousy	p. 250
Men and Women Appreciate Good Grooming	p. 250
No Outside Interference	p. 251
Cat Got Your Tongue?	p. 251
Very Human Cycles	p. 251
Men and Women in the Millennium	p. 253
Communication Now Is Key	p. 253
Equal Pay Is Here to Stay	p. 254
An Open Job Market	p. 254
Sex Role Changes	p. 255
A Woman's Touch and a Man's Touch	p. 255
Exploring Neurological Nuances	p. 256
Life-Saving Differences	p. 256
Knowledge Equals Power of the Sexes	p. 257
Keeping Some Territory Sacred	p. 257
Perhaps We'll Be More Tolerant	p. 258
Are You Really Compatible?	p. 258
Cyber Romance	p. 260
Virtual Relationships	p. 260
Virtual Therapy	p. 261
Free-Flowing Talk	p. 262
Better Daddies	p. 262
Creating a Hybrid	p. 262
The Ideal Balanced Human	p. 263
Becoming True Partners	p. 263
Appendixes
To Order Dr. Lillian Glass' Products	p. 265
References and Further Reading	p. 271
Index	p. 277
Table of Contents provided by Syndetics. All Rights Reserved.

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