It Could Happen to You : Diary of A Pregnancy and Beyond

by Martha Brockenbrough

• ISBN13: 9780740726859
• ISBN10: 0740726854
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2002-09-02
• Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

Summary

Martha Brockenbrough's It Could Happen to You is a delightfully funny diary of the author's own pregnancy through the first year of her daughter's life. It is the perfect antidote to all of the patronizing, horribly dull pregnancy books, which are long on advice and short on laughs.It Could Happen to You began as a column Brockenbrough wrote for the Microsoft Network while she was pregnant. During its tenure on MSN, it was the most widely read column about pregnancy and motherhood on the Internet. It's easy to see why. Brockenbrough's amusing approach to pregnancy and motherhood will strike a chord with experienced moms and the newly pregnant alike, who may wonder, as the author did, "Do I really have to wear maternity clothes'"Throughout the book, Brockenbrough shares her joys and her fears, and asks the questions every new mom wants to know, such as, "Why do old ladies keep telling me my baby is cold'" and shares the realization that "When you're a mother, your guilt light goes off the second you start doing something for you, instead of something for your child." A few not-to-be-missed chapters written by her husband, Adam, such as "A Guy's Guide to Baby Holding," provide a comical male perspective on the whole experience.Refreshingly honest and funny, It Could Happen to You is just right for bolstering the most important tool a new parent has-a sense of humor.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments	p. xi
Introduction: First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage	p. xiii
Before It Was Too Late	p. 1
What Do Baby Chickens Eat?	p. 1
The First Trimester (Now It's Too Late)	p. 5
Testing, Testing: One, Two, Three ...	p. 5
Mom and Dad, I'm Not a Virgin	p. 9
The Garfunkel Syndrome	p. 12
The Worst Day, Ever	p. 15
What's Happening to Me?	p. 18
How to Tell Your Boss You're Pregnant	p. 21
Be Still My Beating Heart	p. 25
The Second Trimester	p. 28
This Is a Kick	p. 28
The Awful Truth about Pregnancy	p. 31
Talking about Sex with Strangers	p. 35
The Name Game	p. 39
The Dad-to-Be's Chapter	p. 42
Finally! Some Good Advice	p. 45
Maternity-Clothes-Minded	p. 49
The Third Trimester	p. 53
Where Babies Come From	p. 53
Everything a Baby Really Needs	p. 57
Womb with a View	p. 60
On Childbirth and Cheese-Steak	p. 64
The Secret Fantasy of All Pregnant Women	p. 68
Letters to a Baby on the Way	p. 72
A Mother's Work Is Never Done	p. 80
Momsomnia	p. 83
The Birthday	p. 88
I Remember the Day You Were Born	p. 89
The Fourth Trimester	p. 98
The Houseguest from Hell	p. 98
Welcoming Wishes	p. 102
Parentnoia	p. 107
The Baby Boom	p. 111
Naked Bliss	p. 114
What's That Smell?	p. 117
How to Dress a Baby	p. 121
Dads Don't Mind (Another One by Adam)	p. 125
Becoming a Mother	p. 128
How to Change a Diaper	p. 132
Mother Love	p. 135
A Day in Cold Hell	p. 138
A Taste of Baby Blues	p. 141
Good Times and Guilt	p. 147
I've Found My Inner Martha	p. 147
We're Bad Parents. Really Bad	p. 153
Lucy in the Sky with Diapers	p. 157
Uptown Girl	p. 160
The Ever-Changing Baby Face	p. 163
My Breast Friends	p. 167
Solid Food, Solid Sleep	p. 170
The Great Baby-Clothes Debate	p. 175
Why I Quit My Job	p. 181
More Than We Can Chew	p. 188
The Tooth Hurts	p. 188
A Guy's Guide to Baby Holding	p. 193
Back in the Running	p. 197
Two Plus One Equals Enough	p. 202
I Love Lucy and She Loves Me	p. 206
Uncle	p. 211
The Model Child	p. 215
The Thing with Lucy's Mouth	p. 218
Lucy on the Loose	p. 222
The Myth of Mother Knows Best	p. 227
Getting a Life	p. 231
The Leather Anniversary	p. 231
How to Put a Baby to Sleep	p. 236
The Age of the Cheerio	p. 242
Pets vs. Babies	p. 246
Lucy's First Word	p. 249
Lucy Learns a Lesson	p. 253
Was I Ready for This?	p. 257
Clash of the Parents	p. 263
Lucy Is One	p. 267
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