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James E. Hughes Jr., Esq., is a resident of Aspen, Colorado, and a retired attorney. Jay is the author of Family Wealth: Keeping It in the Family, and of FamilyThe Compact Among Generations, and numerous articles on family governance and wealth preservation as well as a series of "Reflections" which can be found on the Articles section of his website jamesehughes.com. He was the founder of a law partnership in New York City and has spoken frequently at numerous international and domestic symposia. He is a member of various philanthropic boards and a member of the editorial boards of various professional journals.
Dr. Susan E. Massenzio is a psychologist and founding Associate of Wise Counsel Research Associates, a think-tank and consultancy. Susan has extensive experience consulting to senior executives, leadership teams of Fortune 500 companies, and heads of family businesses. Susan served for many years as the senior psychologist for John Hancock Financial Services, a senior vice president at Wells Fargo Family Wealth, and professor and program director at Northeastern University. Susan is a member of the Collaboration for Family Flourishing.
Dr. Keith Whitaker is an educator and founding Associate with Wise Counsel Research Associates, a think-tank and consultancy. Keith has many years' experience consulting with advisors to and leaders of enterprising families. Keith served as a managing director at Wells Fargo Family Wealth, where he founded the innovative Family Dynamics Practice. He has also served as a researcher at the Center on Wealth and Philanthropy, a private trustee, a director of a private foundation, and a philosophy professor at Boston College.
Preface
Acknowledgments
Introduction
Chapter 1: The Elephant in the Room
Grandparents’ Checks
When Giving Becomes an Opportunity
Chapter 2: The Spirit of the Gift
Where the Spirit Leads
The Who of Giving
Chapter 3: Becoming a Wise Giver
Know Thyself
How Much?
Guilt and Remorse
Nothing Too Much
Chapter 4: Receiving Wisely
A Bad Investment?
The Psychological Stages of Giving
Giving and the Work Ethic
Not Yet
Meteors and Resilience
Investing in Recipients
Chapter 5: Spouses
Learning From Yourselves and Each Other
Three-Step Process
Blended Families
Prenuptial Discussions
Fiscal Unequals
Chapter 6: Grandparents
Grandparents’ Great Opportunity
Involving Parents
Grandparents and Philanthropy
Chapter 7: Trustees
The Choice of Trustee
The Type of Trustee
The Relationship between Beneficiary and Trustee
A Regenerative Role
Chapter 8: Elders
Intergenerational Dynamics
Growing Elders
The Work of Elders
The How of Giving
Chapter 9: Control versus Freedom
The Myth of the Free Gift
Cui Bono?
The Giving of Accounts
Letting Be
Chapter 10: Fair versus Equal, Separate versus Together
The Balancing Act
Pot Shots
Flourishing
Promises
Chapter 11: Giving Outright, via Loans, or in Trust?
Options
Sharing the Spirit
Making Loans Work
Why Trusts?
The Family Bank
Form vs. Function
The What and Why of Giving
Chapter 12: What Families Give
Homes
Business Interests
Values
Reputation
Chapter 13: The Why of Giving
Why Not
The Family Tree
Giving Thanks
About the Authors
Index
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