Dave Barry Turns Fifty

by BARRY, DAVE

• ISBN13: 9780345431691
• ISBN10: 0345431693
• Edition: Reprint
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 1999-08-31
• Publisher: Ballantine Books

Summary

From the Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist comes a celebration of the aging process. Not just Dave's, but that of the whole Baby Boom Generation--those millions of us who set a standard for whining self-absorption that will never be equaled, and who gave birth to such stunning accomplishments as Saturday Night Live!, the New Age movement, and call waiting. Here Dave pinpoints the glaring signs that you've passed the half-century mark: - You are suddenly unable to read anything written in letters smaller than Marlon Brando. - You have accepted the fact that you can't possibly be hip. You don't even know if "hip" is the right word for hip anymore, and you don't care. - You remember nuclear-attack drills at school wherein you practiced protecting yourself by crouching under your desk, which was apparently made out of some kind of atomic-bomb-proof wood. - You can't name the secretary of defense, but you can still sing the Mister Clean song. So pop open a can of Geritol, kick back in that recliner, grab those reading glasses, and let the good times roll--before they roll right over you!

Author Biography

Dave Barry is a Pulitzer prize-winning columnist and the bestselling author of Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus, Dave Barry in Cyberspace, Dave Barry's Guide to Guys, and other books. He lives in Miami, Florida, of course.

Table of Contents

Introduction: It's Great to Be 50!	9	(16)
The Early History of the Boomers: Hey, the World Wasn't Exactly Perfect When We Got Here.	25	(18)
The Fifties: Domestic Prosperity. International Tension. Buffalo Bob.	43	(46)
The Sixties: Hell Yes, We Inhaled.	89	(46)
The Early Seventies: Maturity Rears Its Ugly Head.	135	(26)
An Invitation to Boomers Reaching 50: Unite! You Have Nothing to Lose But...But...	161	(8)
Tips on Looking Young (Fact: Dick Clark Actually Died in 1972.)	169	(12)
25 Things I Have Learned in 50 Years	181	(6)
Sending Your Child to College (Remember: You Don't Need Both of Your Kidneys.)	187	(6)
Planning for Your Retirement: A Sensible Proposal	193	(8)
10 Signs That You Might Be Losing It	201	(2)
Confronting the Inevitability of Death: You Go Ahead. I'm Gonna Watch The Simpsons.	203	(12)
Conclusion: Looking Forward to a Brighter, Better Future. Or Whatever.	215	(4)
Acknowledgments	219