How to Say It for Women : Communicating with Confidence and Power Using the Language of Success

by Mindell, Phyllis

• ISBN13: 9780735202221
• ISBN10: 0735202222
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2001-01-01
• Publisher: Prentice Hall Press

Summary

A guide for women in the workplace to developing stronger language and communicating powerfully. Offers ready to use action plans, self evaluations and crib sheets, as well as stories and advice from women succeeding in the workplace. Shows how to get respect without sacrificing dignity or femininity. Softcover. DLC: Business communication.

Table of Contents

Preface	vii
What the Language of Success Will Do for You	xi
Follow the Leaders to the Language of Success: Leave the Sad Stories Behind	1	(18)
The Language of Weakness	4	(11)
Words That Weaken Your Message	4	(2)
Words That Make You Invisible	6	(2)
Words That Destroy Confidence	8	(2)
Reading As a Power Tool	10	(1)
Put an End to Predatory Language	11	(2)
Seeing Yourself in a New Light	13	(2)
Acquiring the Language of Success: What You Can Learn from Successful Women	15	(2)
The Hero at the Next Desk	16	(1)
The Next Step	17	(1)
Quick Tips	18	(1)
Throw Off Your Shackles: Break Free of the Grammar of Weakness	19	(28)
Embrace Complexity: The Janus Principles	20	(2)
Eradicate the Grammar of Weakness	22	(24)
The Indecisive I	22	(2)
Five Ways I Statements Weaken Language	24	(2)
A Quick Fix for I Statements	26	(2)
Intimacies: Great for the Bedroom, Poison for the Boardroom	28	(2)
Trim Your Hedges: Add Authority to Your Words	30	(2)
What to Say if There's Real Uncertainty	32	(3)
Stop Tripping on Tags: Keep the Power in Your Expression	35	(1)
The OTHER Four-Letter Word That Always Fails	36	(1)
How to Like, Stop Looking, Like, Ditzy	37	(1)
Puny Passives: A World in Which No One Acts	38	(4)
Hypercorrectness: A Poor Camouflage for Weak Language	42	(1)
Modify, Modify, Modify	43	(1)
The Weak Links: And, And, And, But, And, But, And, But	44	(1)
Overkill: Too Many Words, Cluttering Clauses, Jibber-Jabber	45	(1)
Quick Tips	46	(1)
Assert Yourself: Use the Grammar of Power	47	(20)
Charlotte's Grammar	47	(1)
Quick Review: Powerful Forms	48	(1)
Verbs and the Will to Act	48	(2)
Add Vigor with Action Verbs	50	(2)
Distance Yourself for Power and Credibility	52	(2)
The Passive As the Voice of Power	54	(1)
``Show Who Must Be Obeyed'': Instructions That Work	55	(2)
Powerful Ways to Say No	57	(2)
How to Resist Strongly... Yet Softly	59	(2)
Gain Unparalleled Power: The Parallel Form	61	(5)
Quick Tips	66	(1)
Words That Work: Choose Them Wisely	67	(20)
Word Power: How to Follow Charlotte's Example	67	(1)
Six Steps to the Vocabulary of Power	68	(18)
Think Before You Speak	68	(6)
Energize with Action Verbs	74	(1)
Emulate Charlotte: Be Savvy About Business Words	75	(5)
Milk Metaphors: Make Work a Tapestry, a Garden, a Birthplace	80	(4)
Follow the Mentors	84	(1)
Keep Your Word Store Up-to-Date and Ready-to-Use	85	(1)
Quick Tips	86	(1)
Get Organized: A Recipe for Confident Communication	87	(22)
Planning Is Power: Learn from Charlotte's Organization System	88	(1)
Make a Million? Yes. Speak to an Audience? No!	89	(1)
A No-Fail Recipe for Successful Communications	89	(17)
Structures	89	(2)
Thirteen Steps to Organized Presentations	91	(15)
The Price of ``Spontaneity''	106	(1)
Master the Recipe---Then Create	106	(1)
Quick Tips	107	(2)
Stand Up and Speak Like a Woman: Perfect Your Presentations	109	(34)
Overcome the Credibility Gap	110	(2)
Invisible and Silent or Seen and Heard?	110	(1)
You Have the Floor. Now What?	111	(1)
How Not to Give a Talk	112	(2)
How to Construct a Talk That Works	114	(12)
Decide What to Say... and What Not to Say	115	(1)
Write a Script	116	(1)
Include All the Ingredients	117	(1)
Write for Listeners, Not for Readers	118	(1)
Make Your Words Easy to Remember	118	(1)
Use the Grammar of Power	118	(1)
Tell Stories	119	(2)
Remind and Repeat	121	(1)
It's Not Just Rhetoric	122	(2)
Use Precise, Concrete Words and Images	124	(1)
Show Vivid Visuals	125	(1)
How to Control What You Can't Control: The Question-and-Answer Session	126	(3)
How Not to Ask Questions	128	(1)
What to Do When You Get the Floor	129	(4)
Techniques That Fail	131	(1)
Techniques That Work	131	(2)
Sit Down and Speak Like a Woman	133	(1)
Choose Powerful, Precise Language	133	(1)
Make Your Meeting Comments Memorable	133	(1)
Block the Boors	133	(1)
Watch the Powerhouse Women Broadcasters	134	(1)
The Job Interview in the Language of Success	134	(7)
Quick Tips	141	(2)
The Body Language of Power: Lead Without Words	143	(24)
Achieve the Posture of Power	144	(2)
You're Seen Before You're Heard: Send a Powerful Message	146	(1)
First Impressions Count: How to Make Yours Memorable for the Right Reasons	146	(4)
Slouch, Shamble, Trip, Leap, March, or Stride	147	(3)
Body Power from Head to Toe	150	(7)
Hold Your Head High	151	(1)
The Eyes Have It	151	(1)
The Face Tells All... or Nothing	152	(1)
The Trunk Show	153	(1)
Arms and the Woman	154	(3)
The Feet Form the Foundation	157	(1)
Beyond the Body: Your Voice Speaks Volumes	157	(5)
Let's Whisper About Voice	157	(1)
``I Come from Atlanta?''	158	(1)
Faster than the Speed of Sound	159	(1)
Stamp Out Wimpy Noises	160	(1)
Use Silence	160	(2)
Transforming Nervous Nellie: Sure-Fire Confidence Builders	162	(3)
Weigh the Consequences	164	(1)
Laugh at Yourself	164	(1)
Take a Deep Breath	165	(1)
Forget Perfection	165	(1)
Sit Down and Look Strong	165	(1)
Quick Tips	166	(1)
Success Has Its Style: Play Your Role with Panache	167	(12)
Work Is Theater: How to Dress the Part	168	(8)
Hair	169	(1)
Smell	170	(1)
Figure	170	(1)
Face	171	(1)
Clothing	172	(3)
Accessories	175	(1)
Shoes	176	(1)
Business Casual?	176	(2)
Copy the Models of Excellence	178	(1)
Quick Tips	178	(1)
Writing the Language of Success: Use the Mighty Pen	179	(16)
Weak Words from a Top Manager	180	(5)
The Harvard Memo	180	(3)
A Response to ``A Memo Every Woman Keeps in Her Desk''	183	(1)
Elements of Weakness	183	(2)
How to Recast the Memo	185	(3)
Writing in the Twenty-first Century: How the Language of Success Empowers You	188	(5)
Technology Changes, Principles Remain the Same	189	(1)
E-mail Peeves and Tips	190	(2)
Women and the Web	192	(1)
Quick Tips	193	(2)
Why Can't a Woman Read More Like a Man? Empowerment Through Reading	195	(18)
Reading and Success: What (and How) You Read Does Make a Difference	196	(3)
What Do You Read?	197	(1)
How Do You Read?	198	(1)
Reading: The Heart of Communication	199	(10)
How to Read for Power	200	(8)
Read Like a Fencer: No More Ms. Nice Girl	208	(1)
Infiltrate the Enemy Camp: Read What You Abhor	209	(1)
Rebel! Read Aloud	209	(3)
How to Prepare a Text for Oral Reading	210	(1)
Tips on Reading a Talk	211	(1)
Quick Tips	212	(1)
``But I Thought You Said...'': Precise Listening Prevents Problems	213	(18)
Listening: A Top Leadership Skill	213	(1)
What Is Listening?	214	(1)
Impediments to Listening	214	(5)
Filtering	214	(2)
Imprecision	216	(1)
Inattention	216	(1)
Mismatches	217	(1)
Inflexibility	218	(1)
Quiet: I'm Listening	219	(1)
Seven Listening Techniques That Work	220	(10)
``Listen'' to Body Language and Other Nonverbal Clues	221	(1)
Listen Precisely	221	(4)
Repeat or Paraphrase	225	(1)
Empathize	226	(1)
Clarify	226	(1)
Probe	227	(1)
Listen Instructionally	228	(1)
Fit the Technique to the Circumstance	229	(1)
Quick Tips	230	(1)
Running the World---Onward and Upward	231	(14)
The Four Levels of Leadership	232	(7)
The Novice	234	(2)
The Apprentice	236	(1)
The Master	237	(1)
The Mentor	238	(1)
Evaluate Your Leadership Skills	239	(2)
How to Use the Leadership Evaluation	240	(1)
Leadership Evaluation	241	(4)
The Executive Suite: How to Lead with the Language of Success	245	(16)
Manager and Mentor: What Charlotte Teaches Us	246	(1)
Nine Ways to Lead People Through Language... and Inspire Them to Follow	246	(14)
Be Versatile	247	(1)
Accept Credit for Accomplishment Modestly but Strongly	248	(2)
Persuade in the Language of Power	250	(1)
Say No Powerfully, but Kindly	250	(1)
Lead Meetings That Work	251	(4)
Praise Others' Accomplishments When Appropriate	255	(1)
Overcome Hostility, Win Cooperation	256	(2)
Mentor the Inexperienced	258	(1)
Transform Weak Players by Showing Confidence in Them	259	(1)
Quick Tips	260	(1)
Issues and Answers: Putting It All Together in a Complex World	261	(14)
Slurs, Slights, and Put-Downs	262	(4)
Ignore It	262	(1)
Give One Back	262	(1)
Respond in Public but Not in Kind	262	(1)
Respond in Private	263	(1)
Respond in Writing	264	(1)
Ask a Mentor for Help	265	(1)
Apologies	266	(1)
Miscommunication---What to Do When the System Fails	267	(2)
The Scenario: Drowning in the Secretarial Pool	267	(2)
Giving Criticism	269	(4)
Can You Be Kind and Still Lead? Yes!	271	(2)
Confronting Tough Personal Issues	273	(2)
Our Heroes, Ourselves: Empower Yourself and Others	275	(12)
Toward Mastery and Mentoring	275	(2)
Track Your Progress	277	(4)
Happy Endings: The Language of Success	281	(4)
Language Transforms a Weakling	281	(1)
Language Provides the Power to Lead	282	(1)
Language Leads to Opportunities	283	(1)
The Importance of Image	283	(2)
We Can Be Both True Friends and Good Writers	285	(2)
Bookshelf	287	(2)
About the Author	289	(1)
About Well-Read	290	(1)
Index	291