How to Be Single; A Novel

Summary

It's the most annoying question and they just can't help asking you. You'll be asked it at family gatherings, weddings, and on first dates. And you'll ask yourself far too often. It's the question that has no good answer. It's the question that when people stop asking it, makes you feel even worse: Why are you single?On a brisk October morning in New York, Julie Jenson, a single thirty-eight-yearold book publicist, is on her way to work when she gets a hysterical phone call from her friend Georgia. Reeling from her husband's announcement that he is leaving her for a samba teacher, Georgia convinces a reluctant Julie to organize a fun girls' night out with all their single friends to remind her why it is so much fun not to be tied down.But the night, which starts with steaks and martinis and ends with a trip to the hospital, becomes a wake-up call for Julie. Because none of her friends seems to be having much fun right now: Alice, a former legal aid attorney, has recently quit her job to start dating for a living; Serena is so busy becoming a fully realized person that she can't find time to look for a mate; and Ruby, a curvy and compassionate woman, has been mourning the death of her cat for months.So, fed up with the dysfunction and disappointments of being single in Manhattan, Julie quits her job and sets off to find out how women around the world are dealing with this dreaded phenomenon. From Paris to Rio to Sydney, Bali, Beijing, Mumbai, and Reykjav'k, Julie falls in love, gets her heart broken, sees the world, and learns more than she ever dreamed possible. Back in New York, her friends are grappling with their own issues -- bad blind dates, loveless engagements, custody battles, and single motherhood. Through their journeys, all these women fight to redefine their vision of love, happiness, and a fulfilled life.Written in Liz Tuccillo's pitch-perfect, hilarious, and relatable voice,How to Be Singleis the ultimate novel for the adventurer in us all.

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Excerpts

RULE 1 Make Sure You Have Friends How Georgia Is Single"I JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN! NOW THAT I'M SINGLE I JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN! YOU SINGLE PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS HAVING FUN!! WHEN ARE WE GOING TO GO OUT AND HAVE FUN?!!!"She is screaming,screamingat me on the phone. "I WANT TO KILL MYSELF, JULIE. I DON'T WANT TO LIVE WITH THIS MUCH PAIN. REALLY. I WANT TO DIE. YOU HAVE TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY! YOU HAVE TO TAKE ME OUT AND REMIND ME THAT I'M YOUNG AND ALIVE AND CAN HAVE LOTS AND LOTS OF FUN! OR GOD KNOWS WHAT I MIGHT DO!!!" Dale, Georgia's husband, had left her for another woman two weeks ago and she was obviously a tad upset.The call came at 8:45 in the morning. I was at the Starbucks on Forty-fourth and Eighth, balancing a cardboard tray of coffees in one hand, my cell phone and this conversation in the other, my hair in my face, grande mochaccinos tilting toward my left breast, all while paying the nice young twentysomething at the cash register. I'm a multitasker.I had already been up for four hours. As a publicist for a large New York publishing house, part of my job is to cart our writers around from interview to interview as they promote their books. On this morning I was responsible for thirty-one-year-old writer Jennifer Baldwin. Her book,How to Keep Your Husband Attracted to You During Pregnancy, became an instant bestseller. Women all around the country couldn't buy the book fast enough. Because, of course, how to keep your husband attracted to you during your pregnancy should be the main concern for a woman during that very special time in her life. So this week we were making the prestigious morning show rounds.Today, The View, Regis and Kelly. WPIX, NBC, and CNN, so far that day, ate it up. How could you not love a segment showing eight-months-pregnant women how to strip for their men? Now the author, her personal publicist, her literary agent, and the agent's assistant were all anxiously waiting for me in the Town Car that was parked outside. I held the lifeline to their caffeine fix."Do you really feel like you want to kill yourself, Georgia? Because if you do, I'll call 911 right now and get an ambulance over there." I'd read somewhere that you should take all suicide talk seriously, even though I think all she was really doing was making sure I would take her out drinking."FORGET THE AMBULANCE, JULIE, YOU'RE THE ORGANIZER, THE ONE WHO MAKES THINGS HAPPEN -- CALL THOSE SINGLE FRIENDS OF YOURS, THE ONES YOU ARE ALWAYS HAVING FUN WITH -- AND LET'S GO OUT AND HAVE FUN!"As I continued my balancing act toward the car, I thought about how tired that thought made me. But I knew Georgia was going through a difficult period and it would probably get much worse before it got better.It's a tale as old as time. Dale and Georgia had kids, stopped having regular sex, and began fighting. They became distant, and then Dale told Georgia he was in love with a twenty-seven-year-oldwhore gutter trashsamba teacher, that he met at Equinox. Call me crazy, but I'm thinking hot sex might have had something to do with this. Also, and I don't want to be disloyal, and I would never evensuggestGeorgia was at faultin any waybecauseDale is an asshole, andwe hate him now, but I can't resist saying, Georgia completely took Dale for granted.Now, to be fair, I am particularly judgmental about the MarriedWomen Who Take Their Husbands for Granted Syndrome. When I see a very wet man hold an umbrella out to his wife after he has just walked five blocks to pick up the car and drive it back to the restaurant and she doesn't even say thank you, honestly, it makes me very cranky. So I noticed that Georgia took Dale for granted, particularly when she would talk to him inthat tone. The tone that you can dress up and call what you want, but