How to Survive Your Aging Parents

by Berman, Raeann; Shulman, Bernard H.

• ISBN13: 9781572840379
• ISBN10: 1572840374
• Edition: 2nd
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2001-09-01
• Publisher: Surrey Books

Summary

"Mom, we're leaving tomorrow. We're going on vacation for two weeks. Don't forget: call cousin Buddy if you have any problems." "Why should I have problems! I live here alone all the time. I manage fine without you both, thank you." "What's wrong, Mom? What did we do?" Susan is bewildered. "Nothing, nothing." Her mother begins to sob. "Just go on about your business, and don't worry about me."

Table of Contents

Preface	xi
Foreword	xiii
Living on the Far Side	1	(10)
Gaining perspective on social, sexual, and occupational losses of the aged; understanding our emotional responses as adult children responsible for their care.
Missed Signals	11	(14)
Bridging the communication gap between the generations; discovering the hidden agenda of our parents.
Sending Straight Signals	25	(14)
Expressing care, concern, and compassion without reinforcing negative behavior or sending unclear messages.
Status: It's All in the Family	39	(14)
Exploring and controlling changing relationships within the family as parents age and roles change.
Who's The Boss?	53	(18)
The transfer of authority from parent to child: detecting the need; preparing emotionally; making a smooth transition; accepting responsibilities.
Breaking Out of Old, Destructive Patterns	71	(22)
How to counteract manipulative behavior and power plays by understanding our parents' motives and setting our own objectives.
How to Help Our Parents Compensate Constructively	93	(12)
Helping aging parents find positive ways of making up for their losses; a review of organized programs for seniors.
Taking Care of Yourself As Well As Your Parent	105	(20)
Strategies for sharing the care of aging relatives; managing stress and guilt as care-giver.
When Your Parent Has to Move: How to Find the Best Living Arrangements	125	(16)
How to find the best housing options for your parents, whether in your home with back-up care or in independent or assisted living facilities.
How to Talk About Difficult Subjects	141	(18)
Discussing topics such as remarriage, finances, living arrangements, driver's licenses, illness, and death with the elderly.
Dealing with Confusion and Memory Loss	159	(14)
Causes of debility among the aged; symptoms to watch for; coping with malnutrition, medication, and medical care; ways to improve memory.
What Does the Future Hold for America's Seniors?	173	(10)
Changing societal attitudes and evolving social institutions for our expanding senior population.
Appendix of Resources
Organizations, associations, and programs for seniors.	177	(6)
Bibliography	183	(4)
Index	187