Foreword | p. xiii |
Memo from the Sports Desk | p. xvii |
When the Going Gets Weird, the Weird Turn Pro | p. 3 |
The Mailbox: Louisville, Summer of 1946 | p. 3 |
Would You Do It Again? | p. 8 |
The Witness | p. 19 |
There Is No Such Thing as Paranoia | p. 29 |
Strange Lusts and Terrifying Memories | p. 29 |
Rape in Cherokee Park | p. 33 |
God Might Forgive You, but I Won't | p. 34 |
The New Dumb | p. 40 |
In the Belly of the Beast | p. 42 |
Sally Loved Football Players | p. 44 |
Paris Review #156 | p. 46 |
What Marijuana? | p. 53 |
Lynching in Denver | p. 55 |
The Felony Murder Law--Don't Let This Happen to You | p. 60 |
Jesus Hated Bald Pussy | p. 65 |
Politics Is the Art of Controlling Your Environment | p. 71 |
Running for Sheriff: Aspen 1970 | p. 71 |
Sunday Night at the Fontainebleau | p. 97 |
Memo from the Sheriff | p. 102 |
Dealing with the D.A.--Before and After | p. 106 |
Saturday Night in Aspen | p. 112 |
Witness II | p. 116 |
Seize the Night | p. 144 |
The Night Manager | p. 144 |
16 Alexander | p. 153 |
Where Were You When the Fun Stopped? | p. 160 |
September 11, 2001 | p. 161 |
Speedism | p. 168 |
Rules for Driving Fast | p. 168 |
Song of the Sausage Creature | p. 172 |
The Lion and the Cadillac | p. 177 |
Geerlings & the War Minister's Son | p. 180 |
Yesterday's Weirdness Is Tomorrow's Reason Why | p. 187 |
Letter to John Walsh | p. 189 |
The Foreign Correspondent | p. 193 |
May You Live in Interesting Times | p. 193 |
Last Days of Saigon | p. 194 |
One Hand Clapping | p. 196 |
The Invasion of Grenada | p. 199 |
Ambassador to Cuba | p. 217 |
Witness III | p. 241 |
Letter from Lawyer Goldstein | p. 277 |
It Never Got Weird Enough for Me | p. 282 |
Fear and Loathing in Elko | p. 285 |
Heeere's Johnny! | p. 316 |
Kiss, Kiss | p. 326 |
The War on Fat | p. 330 |
Welcome to the Fourth Reich | p. 332 |
Amor Vincit Omnia | p. 335 |
The White Helicopter | p. 335 |
Hey Rube, I Love You | p. 338 |
Fear and Loathing at the Taco Stand | p. 345 |
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