The Nanny Book The Smart Parent's Guide to Hiring, Firing, and Every Sticky Situation in Between

by Carlton, Susan; Myers, Coco

• ISBN13: 9780312199333
• ISBN10: 0312199333
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 1999-03-15
• Publisher: Griffin

Summary

Hiring a nanny-and getting along with her afterward-may be one of the most important things that parents do, yet many of us approach the whole business with fear and trembling, or at least a lot of questions. Even parents who may manage dozens of employees at work can be at a loss when it comes to dealing with the person who will be looking after their children. Nanny, au pair, caregiver-no matter the term, the thorny issues remain the same: How do you find someone you like and trust? Should you invite the nanny to Thanksgiving dinner? When should you raise her fee-and by how much? What should you do when the au pair is a flirt? How do you sort out the laundry and other chores? Nanny surveillance-should you spy? The Nanny Book provides real, down-to-earth solutions for almost every conceivable issue or problem. Filled with advice gleaned through interviews with families and nannies, this book will turn parents into their own experts. Other books focus almost exclusively on hiring a caregiver. The Nanny Book is the only guide that gives smart, parent-tested solutions to those sticky situations that can make or break the relationship.

Author Biography

Susan Carlton is a freelance writer who lives in Cape Elizabeth, Maine, with her husband and two daughters. Currently a contributing editor for Mademoiselle, whe has written for a variety of magazines, including Parents, Parenting, Self and Mirabella.

Coco Myers is a freelance writer who lives in East Hampton, New York, with her husband and two sons. Currently a contributing writer for Elle, she has worked as editor and writer a number of magazines, including Mirabella, Allure, and Self.

Table of Contents

Preface	p. ix
Acknowledgments	p. xi
The Search	p. 1
Profile of a Perfect Sitter	p. 3
Who's Who in the World of Nannies
Type Casting
Age Appropriate
The Right Chemistry
For Appearances' Sake
A Foreign Influence
The Specialist
Where Do Nannies Come From?	p. 17
Working the Grapevine
Advertising Yourself
Coveting Thy Neighbor's Nanny
Pick-up Lines
The Agency Avenue
A Quick Study: Is she Legal?
The Art of the Interview	p. 33
First Impressions
Prickly Questions
Interviewing en Famille
The Unrevealing Conversation
Choosing Between a Few Good Women
Reading (into) a Reference
A Quick Study: The Background Check
The Pay Package	p. 47
Setting the Salary	p. 49
How Much Is Enough?
How Much Is Too Much?
The Deal with Part-Timers
Live-in vs. Live-out
Overtime and Overnights
Accounting for Extras
Docking Pay and Swapping Hours
A Quick Study: On or Off the Books
Raising the Stakes	p. 63
The Salary Bump
The Invisible Increase
Hitting the Ceiling
Bonus Points
The Loan Quandary
Days Off--Official and Otherwise	p. 73
Vacation Time and Timing
Tricky Trades
Holidays, Major and Minor
Snow Days and Sick Days
A Quick Study: Workers' Comp (or How Not to Get Sued)
Division of Labor	p. 87
Sorting out the Laundry and Other Household Chores	p. 89
An Extra Load of Work
Keeping Order
Wearing a Chef's Hat
Endless Errands
The Other Mother	p. 103
In or Out of the Loop
The Uber-Nanny
The Daily Details
Play Dates and Parties
Calling the Time-outs
Differences in Discipline
It's Noon . . . Do You Know Where Your Nanny Is?
A Quick Study: Communication Central
The Good Boss	p. 123
The Balance of Power
Peer Pressure
A Matter of Formality
The Skilled Critic
Losing Your Cool
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Crimes and Misdemeanors	p. 133
Touchy Situations	p. 135
Sex and Politics
Dicey Vices
Petty Theft
Stepping on Toes
Betrayals and Blunders
The Small Stuff	p. 149
Little irritants
A Moody Streak
Watching Her Language
Media Policy
Safe and Sane	p. 157
The Anxious Parent
Judging Her Judgment
Who's Behind the Wheel?
Driving Madly and Badly
Urban Transit
The Unspeakables
A Quick Study: Spying on Nanny
Close Quarters	p. 173
Is the Nanny Coming to Thanksgiving?	p. 175
The Awkward Invitation
Family Affairs
Blurred Boundaries
Coming in Too Close
Living with a Live-in	p. 185
Make Room for Nanny
In Search of Privacy
The Seven-Day-a-Week Sitter
The Summer Fill-in
Who's on Duty?
Social Lives
Adventures with an Au Pair	p. 197
The Real Deal
Hiring and Acquiring
The Long-Distance Interview
After Hours
Working on the Sly
The Problem Au Pair
The Love Affair
Taking Stock	p. 213
How's It Going?	p. 215
The Honeymoon Period
Is "Okay" Good Enough?
Romanticizing an Ex
The Nanny-Kid Clash
The Burn-out Factor
Changes on the Home Front	p. 225
Adding and Subtracting
Uprootings and Upheavals
Home Office Politics
The Brakeup	p. 237
Left High and Dry
The Exit Door
Parting Terms
The Long Goodbye
Appendix	p. 249
Index	p. 251
About the Authors	p. 259
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