The Now Effect How a Mindful... | Buy

Summary

Alleviate stress, ease pain, cultivate emotional freedom, create a healthier brain, and find enlightenment with cutting-edge techniques from The Now Effect.A leader in mindfulness psychology, Dr. Elisha Goldstein takes the mindfulness approach of helping people to connect to the present moment one step further by offering practical techniques to make deep, permanent life changes. He demonstrates how to use the space between stimulus and response to break free from habitual beliefs and thoughts that don't serve you. These techniques allow you to connect with the good in life, approach difficulties with more grace, and get connected with what really matters. In essence, Dr. Goldstein teaches the foundation for how ;this very moment can change the rest of your lifeNow. ; To enhance and ease the reader experience, the text contains Microsoft tags of Dr. Goldstein demonstrating his exercises and the eBook includes embedded videos.

Author Biography

Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D., has a private practice in West Los Angeles and is co-founder of the Mindfulness Center for Psychotherapy and Psychiatry and coauthor of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook. He lives in Santa Monica, California.

Introduction	p. xi
Getting Started
The Wisdom in Golf Balls	p. 3
Paying Attention to Your Intention	p. 7
Understanding What Really Motivates You	p. 10
Playful Discipline	p. 13
See, Touch, Go	p. 15
Now Is the Way	p. 20
Training Ground
Say "Yes!"	p. 27
Where Am I Starting From?	p. 30
Feel the Spaces in Your Body	p. 34
If You Can Name It, You Can Tame It	p. 43
STOP	p. 46
Go	p. 49
The Red Lights in Life	p. 51
A Space for Mindful Eating	p. 53
It's Like This … and This Too	p. 56
One Minute to Bring You into the Now	p. 58
Know Your Mind, Change Your Brain
The Movie in Your Mind	p. 63
Rewrite the Movie in Your Mind	p. 67
Memory Matters	p. 71
Thoughts Are Not Facts	p. 74
Top Ten Hit List	p. 77
Your Mind Traps	p. 80
The Ineffective Art of Blaming	p. 85
Now on Your Diet	p. 88
Maybe So, Maybe Not	p. 92
Now at Work	p. 95
Thinking Small Can Produce Big Results	p. 99
Priming Your Mind For Good
Be Kind Whenever Possible. It Is Always Possible.	p. 107
Compassion Is a Verb	p. 110
I Think I Can, I Think I Can	p. 114
Give Up All Hope for a Better Past	p. 117
Count Your Blessings	p. 120
Present Nostalgia	p. 123
A Smile Is a Source of Joy	p. 125
Do Small Things with Great Love	p. 127
The Seeds of Resiliency	p. 130
Know Your Brain, Change Your Mind
Hi, I'm Your Brain	p. 137
Driving Your Brain (Crazy)	p. 140
The Wonderful World of G ABA	p. 143
The Narrator	p. 146
Free Your Mind	p. 149
"That's Not Fair" Neurons	p. 152
Your Intuitive Brain	p. 154
Wired for Empathy and Compassion	p. 156
Working with Difficult Emotions
Welcome Your Pain	p. 163
The Committee in Your Mind	p. 167
Befriend Your Fear	p. 170
The Anxious Traveler	p. 173
You Are Imperfect Just as You Are	p. 176
Your Joy Is Your Sorrow Unmasked	p. 180
Your ACE in the Hole	p. 183
Anger: Constructive, Destructive, or Both?	p. 186
Getting Connected
The Biggest Disease	p. 193
Disconnection Is Delusion	p. 196
The Science of Connection	p. 198
Why Are You Waiting?	p. 201
Brother Bruno and the Frog	p. 204
Buddha in the Bedroom	p. 207
Relax, Parents, the Answers Lie Within	p. 211
The Aikido of Communication	p. 214
Keep Your Heart Open in Hell	p. 219
Conclusion: The Now Effect Lessons	p. 223
Deepen Your Practice	p. 227
Five-Step Cheat Sheet	p. 243
Training Ground Cheat Sheet	p. 245
Acknowledgments	p. 247
Notes	p. 251
Bibliography	p. 263
Additional Resources	p. 265
Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved.

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Excerpts

1
THE WISDOM IN GOLF BALLS

It is not too uncommon for people to spend their whole life waiting to start living.

—ECKHART TOLLE

A professor stood before a philosophy class holding an empty jar. As the students took their seats, she began filling the jar with golf balls. When they reached the top, she asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then took a bag of pebbles and poured them into the jar, and they made their way into the spaces between the golf balls.

Again she asked the students if the jar was full, and they agreed that it was.

But the professor had another trick up her sleeve. She brought out a bag of sand and proceeded to pour the grains into the jar, filling up more of the remaining space. Again the question came: “It’s full now, correct?” The answer was a resounding “Yes.”

The professor then took a sip of her coffee and dumped the rest into the jar, filling up spaces that no one thought were there.

“So what does it mean?” the professor asked.

A witty student raised his own coffee mug and asked, “There’s always room for coffee?”

The professor, along with the rest of the class, had a good laugh. Then she said, “Imagine that this jar represents the space in your life. The golf balls represent what’s most important—family, children, health, friends, things that you’re passionate about—the things that at the end of your life you would be glad you paid attention to.

“The pebbles are essential but less important, such as your house, your car, maybe your job.

“The sand is all of the small stuff in life that we’re trying not to sweat.

“The coffee, well, you already answered that one.”

The professor continued, “There is room for all of this only if you put the golf balls in first. If you put the sand or pebbles in first, there won’t be room for the golf balls. The way we pay attention to our lives works the same way. If you spend your attention or mental space sweating the small stuff in life, you won’t have the capacity to pay attention to what is most important to you.”

This is a classic story that speaks to becoming more mindful of what really matters. I do the same exercise with my clients and students. Why? Thoughts of what is most valuable fly into and out of our minds all the time, and we don’t see the space between our awareness and these thoughts. This exercise provides a physical representation of thinking about what really matters and simultaneously makes us aware of the space in which we have the opportunity to choose a response. The practice of intentionally paying attention to what matters primes the mind to become more aware of what is meaningful.

The biggest question at this stage of the process is, what in life really matters to you? Is it your relationship to your partner, paying attention to your children, taking care of your body, sharpening your mind, being kind to yourself or others, making room for play, or living with greater ease?

Paying attention to the things that you value in life is fundamental to your happiness. We know that our minds have an inclination to follow the path of least resistance, so we need a compass to help us intentionally come back to our priorities.

now moment

Creating a way to be aware of our values can help us break out of autopilot and guide us back to what really matters.

1. Sit in a space to take care of the golf balls first—the things that really matter. What are your priorities in life? Let’s bring some awareness to them, because at the end of the day, the rest is just sand. Make a list in your mind or write down what truly matters.

2. Sitting exercise: Take a few moments to relax, close your eyes, and practice “Breathing in, I am aware of what truly matters, breathing out, I let go of living on automatic.”

3. Go find a jar and a box of golf balls or some nice stones. Label each golf ball or stone with something that really matters in your life. If you don’t have a physical jar, you can draw a picture of a jar on a piece of paper along with golf balls or stones or perhaps just picture them in your mind. Actions speak louder than words, so check to see where in your life you’re bringing action to your values. Maybe you’re taking your partner out to dinner, responding to people and yourself with greater kindness and compassion, being less judgmental, playing games with your kids, getting back into exercise or yoga, making space for that round of eighteen holes, or spending time in meditation.

4. Put the jar in a prominent place somewhere in your house or office where you can’t miss looking at it. Every time you intentionally look at the jar, your mind is more likely to incline toward what truly matters. As you do this, you prime your mind to respond to those values during the spaces of your daily life.