Once upon a time (well, maybe it was last year) in the land of Oz (a place that looks a lot like Beverly Hills, California), reigning Prince of Darkness and heavy metal legend Ozzy Osbourne, his wife and sovereign ruler, Sharon, and teenage heirs to the throne, Jack and Kelly, gave MTV camera crews the keys to the kingdom for documenting the Osbourne way of life. The result? The Osbournes. The history-making, Emmy-winning, media-frenzied, television-family-concept-redefining reality series that America can't get enough of. The Osbournes are all can't-even-walk-down-the-street-anymore-to-grab-a-bite-to-eat famous. But hey, you knew all that already -- so here's the part of the story that may have gone over your head. What you've got in your hands goes beyond you tuning in to The Osbournes on MTV. Think of it as ordering the Ozzy Super Deluxe -- the fully authorized, officially sanctioned, Sharon's Seal of Approval companion guide to all things Osbourne. It's all here: complete synopses to all ten unforgettable episodes (featuring a Bad Word Box Score), exclusive interviews, hundreds of photos, a private tour of the house, what pet's in the doghouse, an Osbourne lexicon, and so much more. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll wish they lived next door to you (unless you've got the music cranked at 4:00 A.M.). So spend a little time in the land of Oz -- and discover why there really is no #$&*ing place like home.

Todd Gold has previously collaborated with celebrities including Drew Barrymore (Little Girl Lost), Brian Wilson (Wouldn't It Be Nice?), and Richard Pryor (Pryor Convictions). He lives in Los Angeles.

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