Putting Children First

by McDonough, Hanna; Bartha, Christina

• ISBN13: 9780802042170
• ISBN10: 0802042171
• Format: Hardcover
• Copyright: 1999-07-01
• Publisher: Univ of Toronto Pr

Summary

This well researched book illustrates the importance of co-operation in divorce. The authors, experts in the field, present compelling evidence that when separating parents work through their differences, their children remain emotionally connected to both and therefore experience only temporary adjustment problems. However, they also show that prolonged conflict is apt to result in long-term emotional and behavioural problems for the children. This book describes how children often become trophies, pawns, messengers, and mediators when caught in bitter family disputes. This book's child-centred approach helps parents to avoid and/or minimize conflict by transforming themselves from antagonistic spouses into co-operative parents. McDonough and Bartha use their expertise in counselling families to offer a step-by-step guide to the emotional work parents must do to successfully re-negotiate the practical and emotional aspects of their relationship. By combining sophisticated clinical know-how with the latest research and illustrating with clear, easy-to-read vignettes, this book teaches parents how to manage themselves and their children to achieve a successful divorce.

Author Biography

HANNA MCDONOUGH is Chief Social Worker in the Family Court Clinic at the Clarke Division, and Lecturer in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Toronto. CHRISTINA BARTHA is Chief Social Worker in the Mood and Anxiety Disorders Program, Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, at the Clarke Division.

Table of Contents

Introduction	vii
Part I Preventing Conflict
Three Different Kinds of Divorce	3	(6)
The Stresses of Divorce and the Loss of Love	9	(19)
Loss of Full-Time Parenting	28	(9)
The Separating Process	37	(12)
Children's Reactions to Divorce	49	(15)
Talking to Your Children about Your Divorce	64	(7)
The Parenting Plan	71	(11)
Getting to Your Parenting Plan	82	(9)
Part II Managing Conflict by Getting Informed
The High-Conflict Divorce	91	(11)
The Impact of Conflict on Children and Parental Alienation Syndrome	102	(17)
Traditional Custody and Access Arrangements	119	(28)
Part III Damage Control
When You Have to Go to Court and Clinical Assessments	147	(9)
Special Issues: Absent Parents, Spousal Assault, Supervised Access, and Sexual Abuse Allegations	156	(19)
Conclusion	175	(2)
Appendix	177	(4)
References	181