Somewhere in Ireland, A Village Is Missing An Idiot

by FEHERTY DAVID

• ISBN13: 9781590710227
• ISBN10: 1590710223
• Edition: Reprint
• Format: Trade Paper
• Copyright: 2004-06-01
• Publisher: Rugged Land

Summary

The New York Times bestselling author of A Nasty Bit of Rough returns with a singular assortment of ribald observations on golf, life, and how best to not take any of it seriously. A multi-talented combination of Dave Barry, P. J. O'Rourke, and Rick Reilly, David Feherty is the nation's wackiest and most popular on-screen golf personality. His back-of-the-book "Sidespin" column is the most turned-to feature in Golf Magazine and his unmistakable Irish lilt and sensibility is a mainstay on CBS Sports golf broadcasts. But what of his rumored dark Irish sense of humor? What does Feherty really think -- and cannot share on national television -- about the Sturm und Drang of the professional golfing world? Or, for that matter, what does he think is the appropriate diet for those of us who like to partake of a wee bit of adult beverage in the evening? Now, at long last, readers can distill Feherty's uncensored brand of idiocy for themselves. Sure to put a smile on the crankiest duffer in the family, Somewhere in Ireland, a Village is Missing an Idiot answers the question all Feherty fans have been asking themselves for a year... Who is this guy and why is he here? Book jacket.

Author Biography

Upon his retirement from professional golf in 1997, David Feherty has been a mainstay throughout the PGA golf season on CBS Sports as an on-course personality and commentator. Feherty also writes golf's most popularcolumn, "Sidespin," for Golf Magazine. In addition, he writes a biweekly column for Golfonline.com, the most popular golf website. A major draw at clinics and speaking engagements throughout the year, Feherty has been called "The Class Clown of Commentary", and "Golf's Ultimate Wise Guy."
Feherty enjoyed a very successful professional career with ten victories on the European Tour, over $3 million won in prize money, and an appearance on the European Ryder Cup Team in 1991. Born and raised in Ireland, he now lives in Irving, Texas with his wife Anita and their five children, Erin, Rory, Shey, Karl, and Fred.

Table of Contents

Foreword
Chapter One: Who Am I? And Why Am I Here?	1	(16)
The Guy on the Fairway
The Hairy One
The Invisible Man
Dinner Is Served
Chapter Two: Game Theories	17	(40)
Carrying On
Caddie Firings and Stupid Rules
Hypocritical Headache
That Was Ugly
Members of the Club
Try This Silly Season Event
Going Mad
The Kingdom of Fandom
Neither Wind nor Rain
Girls in the Boys' Club
Chapter Three: My Less Than Finest Hours	57	(40)
Queasy Ryder
Passages, Port-l-lets, and Pepto-Bismol
Scratching an Itch
Letting Loose
Out-of-Mind Experiences
A Very Bad Day
Warning: Stoned Hippos
Working Vacation
Taking Complete Relief
Walking Wounded
Humanity Stripped Naked
Chapter Four: The Wages of Idiocy	97	(34)
We Media Types Are Full of Stupid Questions
Survivor
Climbing Down from the Tower
A Salute to Kenny
Next Question, Please
An Average Week... Not!
Out of My Element
In Istanbul, the Author Calls It Quits
Tiger's Race Is the Human Race
Late Night Lunacy
Starting Off on the Wrong Foot
Chapter Five: A Confederacy of Idiots	131	(34)
Abjectively Objective
The Late Night Show, Take Two
The Retiring Type
Cavemen at Hilton Head
Slip of the Lip
Sam's Club
Handshake Agreement
Men Behaving Badly
With Friends Like Sam...
Chapter Six: Pet Peeves	165	(30)
Travels with Davey
Chewing the Fat
Expletive Unchained
A Message from the "Meridian Mail Lady"
House Guests
I Say!
Pro-Am Purgatory
Alphabet Soup at the Grocery Store
Chapter Seven: A Tour of the Tour	195	(36)
Playing Partners
Remembering a Friend
Arnold, King of Sport
Touched by an Angel
I Hate to Say It, but I Told You So
Lehman's Class, the Ryder Cup, and Caddies
Creatures Great and Small
Another Side of John Daly
Talking (Club)heads
A Hero for the Ordinary Joe
When he was a *@#$% Golfer
Chapter Eight: A Hallowed and Formidable Tradition of Idiocy	231	(36)
Here Endeth the Lesson
Holiday Time at the Fehertys
Creatures Great and Small (Again)
Fond of a Joke and a Jar
Burned on the Dark Continent
Fathers and Sons
Teaching the Tykes
Well, Excuse Me
Uncle Dickie's Ryder Cup Analysis
Family Chain
Chapter Nine: Idiots Delight	267	(32)
A Weighty Matter
Prepping for Augusta
Fashion Statement
Man and Beast
New York, Hole by Hole
Rhythm of the Times
Guardians of the Game
Wish Upon a Star
Credits	299