Tell Me No Lies How to Stop Lying to Your Partner---and Yourself--in the 4 Stages of Marriage

by Pearson, Peter T.; Bader, Ellyn; Schwartz, Judith D.

• ISBN13: 9780312280628
• ISBN10: 0312280629
• Edition: Reprint
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2001-12-14
• Publisher: Golden Guides from St. Martin's Press

Summary

Lying-For Better or WorseEverybody lies. Friends lie to friends. Children lie to their parents. Politicians lie to constituents. And, inevitably, husbands and wives lie to each other. Lies between lovers have tremendous potential to both nurture and destroy a relationship. It is easy to underestimate the power that lies-even seemingly harmless lies-can wield in your marriage. Tell Me No Lies explores the complexity of honesty versus deception in marriage and reveals the many reasons behind the lies we tell our partners (and ourselves). Learn the four marital stages: * The Honeymoon * Emerging Differences * Freedom * Together as TwoDiscover how to recognize how lying can lead to serious trouble at each stage. The signs include: * The Dark Side of the Honeymoon, when couples refuse to acknowledge any problems * The Stalemate, when couples fight and brutalize each other with exaggerated truths * Freedom Unhinged, when independence outweighs togetherness and marital anarchy ensues.Offering a new way of thinking about truth and deception, this book will help you understand the dynamics of your marriage in the context of the marital stages. If you can identify your marital stage, you can overcome the barriers to honesty and move on to a happier and more fulfilling marriage!AUTHORBIO: Dr. Ellyn Bader and Dr. Peter Pearson are internationally recognized experts on couples therapy and cofounders and directors of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, California. They are also the authors of the award-winning In Quest of the Mythical Mate. They live in Menlo Park and have three daughters.Judith D. Schwartz is a widely published writer with a specialty in psychology. The author of The Mother Puzzle, she lives in Bennington, Vermont with her husband, Tony Eprile, and their son, Brendan.

Author Biography

Dr. Ellyn Bader and Dr. Peter Pearson are internationally recognized experts on couples therapy and cofounders and directors of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, California. They maintain an active lecture and workshop schedule for couples and professionals, and they have appeared on a variety of radio talk shows. Bader served as President of the International Transactional Analysis Association; Pearson is a Consulting Associate Professor at Stanford University. They are also the authors of In Quest of the Mythical Mate, which received the Clark Vincent Award for its outstanding contribution to the field of marital therapy from The California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. They live in Menlo Park and have three daughters.

Judith D. Schwartz is a widely published writer with a specialty in psychology. The author of The Mother Puzzle, she lives in Bennington, Vermont with her husband, Tony Eprile, and their son, Brendan.

Table of Contents

Truth ... and Consequences	p. 1
The Complex Lies of Husbands and Wives	p. 22
The Lie Invitee	p. 37
The Honeymoon: So Sweetly Self-Deceived	p. 57
The Dark Side of the Honeymoon: So Anxious for Happiness	p. 77
Emerging Differences: Getting to Know (and Like) You	p. 101
Seething Stalemate: Starting to Know (and Dislike) You	p. 125
Freedom to Explore: The Surprising Gift of Space	p. 149
Freedom Unhinged: The Shocking Price of "Anything Goes"	p. 174
Together as Two: The Compelling Case for Getting to the Truth	p. 199
Truth: A User's Guide	p. 218
Authors Note	p. 242
Acknowledgments	p. 243
About the Authors	p. 244
Table of Contents provided by Syndetics. All Rights Reserved.

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