What Your Body Says (And How to Master the Message) Inspire, Influence, Build Trust, and Create Lasting Business Relationships

by Sayler, Sharon

• ISBN13: 9780470599167
• ISBN10: 0470599162
• Edition: 1st
• Format: Hardcover
• Copyright: 2010-08-02
• Publisher: Wiley

Summary

Train your body to communicate with confidence and clarity-have your body match what your mouth says...The popular phrase "leading from influence" takes for granted that influence derives chiefly from verbal communication. However, communication is about more than words. To get to the next level in your career, you must communicate with your entire self.What Your Body Says gives you the straight-up "how-to" on unifying what you say with what you do, allowing you to better connect with other people and reach your full leadership potential. It gives you a clear and simple process to follow, all drawn from an intense study of how language impacts people's lives and emotions. Filled with useful tools, strategies, and techniques, this book gives you the key to Speak intelligently while looking smart, engaging and real Deliver unpleasant messages without pain or guilt Having a committee meeting and getting something done And moreWritten by Sharon Sayler, a highly accomplished expert in marketing, presentations, and body language, What Your Body Says is the only guide you need to achieve the competitive edge in your personal and business communication style.

Author Biography

Sharon Sayler is the co-owner and founder of Impression Engineers, an award-winning online marketing and design company. As a Certified Group Dynamics and Behavioral Coach, Sharon trains, counsels, and coaches professionals to become stronger, more influential communicators and leaders. Sharon is an active contributor to SelfGrowth.com and has, for the past two and a half years, written the weekly blogs Best Impressions and Beyond Lip Service.

Visit Sharon online at www.SharonSayler.com and www.ImpressionEngineers.com.

Table of Contents

Foreword	p. ix
Foreword	p. xi
About the Author	p. xiii
Acknowledgments	p. xv
About This Book	p. xvii
Introduction	p. 1
Understanding the Difference between Power, Intimidation, and Influence	p. 6
How Influence Equals Opportunity	p. 7
Items of Note	p. 10
The Signals You Are Sending	p. 13
Good versus Bad Nonverbals	p. 15
How the Signals Work	p. 19
Intentional Gestures Are a Powerful Tool	p. 20
When and How the Gesture Happens	p. 22
How Long to Hold the Gesture	p. 25
ôBut Wait, There's More …ö Connecting Two Ideas Nonverbally	p. 25
How to Disconnect Two Ideas Nonverbally	p. 28
Gestures of Relationship	p. 33
How to Attach Yourself to a Message	p. 41
How to Create a Visual Placeholder	p. 43
Gestures of Location	p. 53
How to Use Locations	p. 54
How to Create a Phantom Location	p. 56
How to Assign Negatives to a Location	p. 57
How to Avoid Cross-Contaminating Your Message	p. 63
Gestures That Teach	p. 65
Keep the Gesture Simple and Familiar	p. 66
Verbal and Nonverbal Congruency	p. 70
Do I Always Have to Be Congruent?	p. 71
Gestures of Expectation and Influence	p. 73
How to Use Your Posture to Show Your Confidence	p. 74
Manage the Behavior-Not the Person	p. 79
Proactive versus Reactive	p. 80
I Expect You to Wait	p. 83
Power Gestures	p. 86
How to Confirm Others' Perception of the Experience	p. 87
The Eyes Have It	p. 91
Where Do I Put My Eyes?	p. 92
What Can I Do with My Eyes?	p. 94
Eyes and Emotion	p. 95
How to Manage with Eye Contact	p. 96
Pros and Cons of Little or No Eye Contact	p. 97
How the Signals Sound-The Voice	p. 101
Voice Patterns of What We Do and Who We Are	p. 105
How to Use the Credible Voice Pattern	p. 106
How to Use the Connection Voice Pattern	p. 108
Is Your Voice Sabotaging You?	p. 110
Addicted to the Verbal Pause	p. 112
The Need to Breathe	p. 113
The Unintentional Nonverbals	p. 119
Fidget Reboot Button	p. 121
The Nonverbal Outburst	p. 122
The Fine Print in Your Owner's Manual	p. 125
The Trick Is to Remain Flexible	p. 126
Master the Behavior Game	p. 128
Putting It All to Work	p. 137
Feelings Change Facts	p. 138
Emotions Motivate	p. 139
How to Communicate a Clear Direction	p. 140
Observe to Become Self-Aware	p. 141
How Context Controls the Message	p. 141
Final Thoughts: Master Your Message-Next Steps	p. 146
Cheat Sheets	p. 149
Resources and Recommended Reading	p. 158
Quick Reference Guides	p. 160
Index	p. 170
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