Women and Desire : Beyond Wanting to Be Wanted

by YOUNG-EISENDRATH, POLLY PHD

• ISBN13: 9780609805305
• ISBN10: 0609805304
• Format: Trade Paper
• Copyright: 2000-11-01
• Publisher: Three Rivers Press

Summary

Provocative and vital, this groundbreaking book delves into the complex world of female desire and discovers that, sadly, women often want to be wanted rather than to be fully engaged with life. Instead of being able to know what they really want or who they really are, women have been conditioned to accept images -- the good daughter, the nice friend, the ideal boss, the perfect mother -- to define themselves through reflections from others. As a result, self-direction, self-determination, and self-confidence are undermined from adolescence through old age. A double bind comes to surround female desire: a woman is damned as "the bitch" if she is direct and self-determining; but she is confused and indirect if she plays the Object of Desire. Dr. Young-Eisendrath shows us how to break out of this double bind so that we can encounter the challenges of choice and responsibility for our own desires. She wisely uses mythological and personal stories to help us take control of our sexual, relational, material, and spiritual lives. If you feel confused, resentful, or trapped in a life that does not seem to be fully yours, then you can find a clear path to your true self, once and for all, with the help ofWomen and Desire.

Author Biography

Polly Young-Eisendrath, Ph.D., is clinical associate professor of psychiatry at the University of Vermont Medical College and lectures worldwide on the topic of women's development. She lives in Vermont.

Table of Contents

Introduction	xiii
Wanting to Be Wanted	1	(32)
The Menace of Female Beauty	33	(24)
Sex through the Looking Glass	57	(27)
Hothouse Mothering and the Divine Child	84	(38)
The Material Girl and the Hungry Ghost	122	(31)
The Spiritual Problem of Giving Your Self Away	153	(33)
The Paradox of Freedom and Desire	186	(21)
Notes	207	(19)
Bibliography	226	(14)
Index	240