What Really Helps Using Mindfulness and Compassionate Presence to Help, Support, and Encourage Others

by Wegela, Karen Kissel; Richo, David

• ISBN13: 9781590308806
• ISBN10: 1590308808
• Edition: Revised
• Format: Paperback
• Copyright: 2010-12-28
• Publisher: Shambhala

Summary

Drawing on her experience as a psychotherapist and psychology professor, Karen Kissel Wegela offers clear, practical advice on the art of helping others. Despite our good intentions to help, we often hold back because we donrs"t know what to say or do-and we sometimes find that our best attempts to help end up making things worse. What are the best ways to provide emotional support, guidance, or encouragement to the people in our lives? Here is a book that provides answers, and that will be of special interest to helping professionals-as well as to anyone who wants to make a positive difference in the lives of people they care about. Wegelars"s core message is that in order to be truly helpful to others, we need to develop greater awareness, kindness, and compassion for ourselves. Only then we can extend these qualities to the people wers"d like to help.What Really Helpshighlights the use of mindfulness, or learning to become fully present in the moment. When we learn how to be fearlessly and compassionately present, we find that we are better listeners, and we are wiser about what actions to take and what guidance to give others.

Author Biography

Karen Kissel Wegela, PhD, is a therapist, a professor of contemplative psychology at Naropa University, and the author of a popular blog for Psychology Today. She is also the author of the book The Courage to Be Present: Buddhism, Psychotherapy, and Awakening Natural Wisdom. For more information, visit karenkisselwegela.com.

Table of Contents

Foreword	p. ix
Preface	p. xiii
Acknowledgments	p. xv
Introduction	p. 1
Cultivating Openness
The Discovery of Space and Brilliant Sanity	p. 13
Being Present	p. 20
Sitting Meditation	p. 26
The Spectrum of Brilliant Sanity	p. 37
Appreciating the Richness of Experience
Touch and Go	p. 51
No Strings Attached	p. 60
Friendliness without Limit	p. 66
Seeing Clearly
With the Best of Intentions	p. 79
If I'm Brilliantly Sane, Why Am I So Confused?	p. 87
The Light's On, but Nobody's Home	p. 95
Gateways between Confusion and Brilliant Sanity	p. 104
Expressing Genuine Relationship
Hospitality	p. 115
Open House of the Heart	p. 127
Generating Compassion	p. 136
Being a Good Listener	p. 144
That's a Good Question	p. 151
Giving and Receiving Feedback	p. 157
Taking Action
Simple Helping Actions	p. 171
Untapped Resources	p. 182
Mindful Companionship	p. 188
Teamwork	p. 197
Body-Speech-Mind Groups	p. 205
Coming Back Home	p. 215
Appendices
Seeking Additional Help	p. 223
Contemplative Psychotherapy Training at Naropa University	p. 229
Meditation Center Information	p. 233
Index	p. 235
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